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My mother, almost 75, is getting ready for an anterior (and posterior) approach cervical fusion. She has bad osteoporosis, and the dr says because of this he will have to go from both sides. She’s also seeing a sports med dr to start medicine for the osteoporosis. Surgeon says she’ll go to rehab for a few weeks after, due to her legs already being weak.



Also, I’d posted about her being estranged, mentally ill, house hoarded etc. Elder lawyer says I must get immediate POA (currently only have springing) or walk away. We’ve been working on getting her ready for surgery, cardiac clearance etc. Osteo doc is last step. After this weeks visit I plan to have the difficult POA discussion. We’ve also been getting her house cleaner, utilities current etc.



So, with her mental issues plus prior history of delerium in the hospital, I predict this will be awful.



Im trying to be as prepared as possible for anything. What sort of clothing and how much do we pack for rehab? Label with her name? Best way to do that? Does rehab wash their clothes?
I honestly predict she’ll be too mentally whacked to cooperate and they will kick her out.
Her laundry is still sort of all over the house , and I’ll prob just buy her stuff and wash it and pack at my house. Her place also just doesn’t smell good and her clothes smell like that.

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When my mom went to rehab I was told not to bring a lot of clothes. There is only a small space to store clothes.

My mom was very stylish but I made sure that mom had comfortable clothes to wear to rehab.

Since you are buying your mom new clothes, I would keep it simple. Buy for comfort. Yes, do mark your mom’s name on her clothes. You can use a sharpie or a fabric marker. Or you can order labels from Amazon.

I was told to place signs in my mom’s room if I was going to do the laundry. I chose to do my mom’s laundry for her and I did place a large sign and housekeeping didn’t notice it.

My mom had a fit because one of her favorite blouses was missing. I went down to the laundry area and found her blouse for her. These things occasionally happen.

My mother did well in rehab.

Wishing you and your mom all the best.
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Yes, most rehabs will wash the clothing. If she is comfortable with soft sweat pants and t shirts, a sweat shirt or sweater or two, start there. They will be doing a lot of walking with her, and some exercises. Most of all, comfortable, well fitting, lace shoes if she has them for stability. A good place to start. Mark her clothing with washable indelible markers. Don't spend a lot, as things tend to go missing as I recall with my brother. Places vary a bit. Best of luck.
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Clothing should be loose and comfortable and not baggy. Also, from personal experience unless you label her clothes so that everyone can see it outwardly [I wrote our family member's name on her sleeves and along her pockets - writing on the inside does no good] her clothes will be part of a pool of shared clothing. Laundry service is a week behind so if you don't bring extra clothes in between washes she will be given other people's clothes to cover the gap. We also put a sign on her closet door and let the staff know that our family would wash and return clothes. This applies to shoes and perscription glasses as well. Unfortunately, things go missing from time to time.
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It was suggested that we get our mom some clothes from a resale thrift shop. Most of the clothes there were decent quality and we didn't have to worry about losing any of her favorite clothes.

Also, do her laundry if you can. Rehab laundry will lose a lot of it, even if it's labeled.
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The place mom had her rehab was pathetic.. I visited every day & she was in the same clothes for 3 days. The nurse said nobody could find her suitcase! I was livid
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JoAnn29 Mar 2023
When Mom was in AL I was able to put her depends on a shelf above her toilet. Easy reach for the aides. I get a call from the Medtech saying Mom was out of Depends. Noooooo, they are in her closet, a closet right next door to the bathroom. Really, I am the only one that put depends in the closet? No under the sink cabinet in the bathroom because the sink is wheelchair accessible.
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Believe me, I love aides I would not do their jobs for all the money in the world, but sometimes if not right in front of them they don't see it. I washed my moms clothes while in rehab. Yes, they got thrown in with everyone elses. It was right on her closet door family was doing laundry so please put dirty clothes in basket provided. I said something to an aide and she wrote a big note "family doing laundry" and taped it above Moms bed. It worked.

I would not buy Mom new clothes. Wash what she has. Soak them for a little while, (I found Tide oringinal gets out smells) throw a cup or two of vinegar in the wash. Like said, comfortable clothing. I think therapy likes sneakers but you can call them. Get iron on laundry tape and put her name inside where the tags are. You do her clothes. I would say have 5 to 7 outfits. Always leave one or two sets when u do her laundry. I kept Moms in sets. I ended up having to hang her bra with the sets. Only one pair of shoes. I would leave any jewelry she wears at home. She is going to have to take it off for surgery anyway.

If your POA is Springing and the doctor feels Mom is not competent to make decisions, then he can put it in effect. If you need more than one doctor to sign off, I am sure the doctor can help u there. If Mom is considered incompetent, then she can't change the POA to immediate.

"She’s also seeing a sports med dr to start medicine for the osteoporosis." Be careful about medicines for osteoporosis. It has been found that those every 6 months, once a year treatments were causing brittle bones and women were getting fractures much easier. So its a catch 22, your either going to get a fracture from the osteo or the brittle bones. Me, I rather not take the med. But seems your Mom has very bad osteoporiosis.
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Oedgar23 Mar 2023
Thanks for your reply. The surgeon says she has to get osteo treated, because he can’t rebuild her neck with poor quality bone.
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Agree with all the above.

Make sure mom doesn't take anything to rehab she wouldn't mind 'losing' and without a question, no jewelry!!!!! I know a lot of women would rather cut off a finger than remove their wedding rings, but they can easily slip off and be lost for good. No earrings either. The less you take with her, the less to lose.

JoAnn's idea of hanging 'sets' of clothing in the closet is great. No decisions, just grab a 'set' and get going. That would also help to see if she's getting showers/bed baths--by the way the clothes 'move through' the system.

I'd start working on getting that PoA in order sooner rather than later. My mom was thrilled to 'dump' a lot of her life decisions on the 2 brothers who were her reps. Not everyone is thrilled to hand that over.
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Sweat pants and nothing that pulls over her head. She's going to have a big neck brace on, so front buttoning/zipping only.

Name on everything. I had custom iron-on tags made for my mom's clothes, because most places just try to write their names on the tags with a laundry marker, and it washes out or is just too hard to read. I ironed on those tags and sewed them in, too. (Round out the sharp corners, or they itch.) Get them from Amazon.
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I got some good deals at Walmart today bin clearance stuff. I got four sets of t shirts and drawstring knit capri pants in simple colors to mix and match. Plus two sweaters because she is always cold. Will also look at Goodwill and get some laundry labels.
The hanging sets in the closet is a good idea.
Mom is still considered competent. She’s actually improved since she got out of the hospital in October. Her PCP has her on B12 to correct a deficiency. That said, no amount of B12 will fix her major depression (with psychotic features imho), anxiety, lying, and narcissism. But her life is more stable and also better since she’s no longer overmedicated with a plethora of opiates, muscle relaxers, etc. She was taken by EMS twice last year for opiate overdose. Neighbor says she was outside naked and this is also in her medical record.
move been going to her psych NP w her who also feels this was over medication.
I think this surgery will destabilize what I’ve spent months working on. Sigh.
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NeedHelpWithMom Mar 2023
My mom’s doctor put her on B12 too. Not sure if it helped her much.

I’m glad that you were able to find suitable clothes at Walmart. I don’t blame you for shopping for inexpensive sale items to go to rehab in.

I hope that your mom does well in rehab. It’s tiring for them but my mom did improve.

They will update the family at her care meeting. In our case, everyone was present, the occupational and physical therapists. They said mom participated and worked hard but would benefit from a few extra days of rehabilitation. Mom paid out of pocket for the additional days. The rest was covered by her insurance.
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