boy oh boy! 2 wks ago my partner and I took my 80 yo mother to lunch and she was doing really well. Occasionally she shes things - like puppies that aren't there but all in all not bad. Then she got pneumonia (again) dr. admitted her and we go downhill from there. She spent a week in the hospital - and was changed to a different room every other day which I'm sure adds to confusion. Then she gets discharged to a rehab center. I go to see her there the day after she gets there and she's half asleep at 3:30 pm (in her clothes) because they said she was up and down the night before. She was VERY confused, though she did know us. My brother saw her yesterday and she's getting 2 percocet for breakfast and 2 for lunch! She has never taken this much pain medication before. She has back pain - but this is too much! She was eating tossed salad and anything else in the hospital - now they've got her on pureed food. They say she's pocketing food. Seems that when she goes to these places she gets worse! They've got male attendants changing her depends and she doesn't like this. Does anyone think we can get them to use a female? I'm worried about talking to the dr abt the drugs - but I've never seen her look this bad. She normally lives with my brother and his wife and eats well Am I wrong in thinking that issues like drugs and pureed food might add to her confusion? Previously in a 2 week period she took all of 12 pain pills - and now...!
Now, if the doctor won't listen to carefully observed side effects or isn't willing to try something else, then I think a little disgust is called for, perhaps even changing doctors. But do recognize that the science of medicine only goes so far, and we can't expect every single decision to be perfect for every single individual.
The very sad and extreme exception I have heard of over and over usually involves emergency room doctors who administer certain antipsychotics even the patient's chart indicates an allergy and the patient's family pleads against it. That can and has caused permanent harm to persons with Lewy Bodies in their brains. That, I think, is beyond incompetence. It is morally reprehensible.
Sometimes the male attendants are needed for lifting a patient etc but not for bathing her. Go to her doctor, go to the head of the nurses, go to the rehab manager
keep going up the chain til you get a response - daily. We fought for my sister in law as well - it takes persistance, determination, daily contacts. Keep a journal
dated when you visit or talk to someone - so you have a way to keep up with
all your efforts - carry it with you. Also note in it when you visit her - her conditions, the staff response, list names!! etc. Take photos! You need documentation!
It is sad, but I truly believe that an elder cannot be left in a hospital or transitional care unit without constant family supervision.
I am not a fan of these heavy duty pain medications and sedatives for seniors. It is a way of controlling them.
As Carol said above, ask lots of questions until you are satisfied. Monitor her meds like a hawk. Also, if there is a better rehab in your town, have your mother transferred. (we had two in our town; one was great, the other was terrible)
good luck
Take care,
Carol