My mom has had some dementia the last few years but it hasn't been a major issue until this week.
She lives with my father who my mom now thinks is her mother. She is calling everyone in the family asking if we know where dad is. We took her to the ER to check if there was a stroke and have other blood/urine testing to see if there were any physical or chemical imbalance issues. Nothing showed up though we're scheduling an appointment for her to see her primary physician tomorrow.
Sometimes, she briefly recognizes my dad which leads to her hallucinating a woman in another room. When we were going to the hospital, she would ask "what should we do with her?". Later in the day, she recognized my dad and said the woman was gone. But, the next morning, dad was again her mom or a woman and she was calling around to find my father.
Initially, my sister tried to convince her dad was not her mother. This just led to more confusion and frustration. She sometimes seemed to understand only to become confused again. I think I've convinced them that they have to go along with her, keep her calm, and comfort her as best we can. Her reality has changed and trying to convince her only upsets her.
We're hopeful her doctor can help make the hallucinations go away because my father is my mom's caregiver and, if she doesn't trust him because she doesn't see him for who he is, I fear she may do something like leave the house or something else to put him in harm's way. Dad's health isn't great either so I'm concern about him having to deal with all this.
This is our families first experience with dementia. All we've had the last few years is mom's forgetfulness and confusion. Any advice is appreciated.
She's had a psyche exam today. I suspect we'll get the results on Monday. I am hoping the doc will begin meds to help so they can see the impact before she is discharged.
Things are progressing. I am cautiously optimistic. Our next visit is Sunday afternoon.
We're both live close which means we probably can rotate staying over.
I'm sure Dad has kept a lot from us as far as Mom's confusion the last few years. I remember her mother's dementia when I was a boy. At the time, I think they called it "Hardening of the Arteries" or some such. I just remember her being extremely paranoid and thinking the FBI had camera in every electrical socket in the home.
Thanks for the suggestions for reading. I think a part of me denied what we've been seeing with Mom the last few years. I do wish I was better prepared now but I'm guessing no one is every fully prepared for something like this.
Feel good about the fact that you are on top of things now. have a plan in place to support your dad and get your mom the help she needs and coordinating all of this with your sister as both of you get a crash course from reading online about the journey you are on and what lays ahead.
I wish you and your family the best in all of this. Have a good dinner and discussion about this. Keep in touch. Let us know how you are doing and how things are going. Try to take good care of you in this very stressful crisis time. It will all work out.
I've not talked to her doctor as she was just admitted late this afternoon but understand it to be a 13-day program and that they'll get all her meds out of her system, treat her UTI and begin the evaluation process. I assume, if there is a way to treat her dementia, they'll explore drugs and need time to evaluate them.
I don't know how long it takes for drugs to leave the body. She's been off three days now from most. I hope to talk to someone there later tomorrow about their course of treatment.
Mom was very angry but she understands we love her and think this is best for her. She totally disagrees that she needs to be there or that there are any issues. I just hope that, in the end, a diagnosis occurs and a plan to help soon follows.
Urinary tract infections can very definitely be responsible for odd behavior. My aunt hallucinated when she had one -- that was the main symptom. She did not have dementia. My mother has dementia and all her symptoms were much, much worse while she had a uti.
Just getting the uti cleared up should be a big help.
But with or without a uti, your mom has dementia and needs to get her drugs evaluated and on a good plan. She will most likely NOT be able to be in charge of them again.
My husband did not go to a psychiatric center but his very competent geriatrician took him off nearly all his drugs shortly after his dementia diagnosis. (That is, all except the ones recently added by a behavioral neurologist.) Gradually most of the drugs were added back in.
One of the primary reasons my mother could not continue to live alone with her mild dementia was her total inability to manage the few drugs she needed. If she returns home, can your father mange giving her her meds? Can you or your sister assist with filling her pill box?
I am very glad to hear progress is being made. Please, do keep us informed about how this all works out. We care. And we learn from each other.
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