Mom is 87 and has live in memory care for a little over a year. The place is small and she is with 6 other people in different stages of the disease. Mom thinks she shouldn't be there.. everyone else has problems but she thinks she can take care of herself. Mostly she is extremely slow at walking, needs help using the toilet, and gets lost in her small living area. I saw her today and she remembers a conversation we had last week about my sister moving in with her so she can go home... Home dosen't exist anymore the house is empty of all her belongings and is going up for sale next month.
She says she's very unhappy where she is and she wants to leave. I get very frustrated and angry with my siblings as I am the only one who visits.. they are an hour away but they don't call either. I just don't know how to answer the question anymore I'm tired
I just want you to know is that even when my mom in her own home she would ask to go home. We would be sitting in her living room and she would be extremely agitated and want to go home. This helped me to realize that "I want to go home" doesn't actually mean she wants to go to the house she has been living in for the past 30 years. For my mom, we tried many different tactics...we will go soon; lets have lunch first; take a drive and come back saying "we are home!"...We have tried many different ways to just bring her comfort. So my advise is to just come up with therapeutic lies to provide your mom with comfort. "You can come home when the doctor feels you are ready"..."The house is having some work done, it will take a while"... I have heard others say using validation statements, "I know you would like to be in your own home..." followed with a distraction such as, what would you like to do at home; or let's have a cookie; or did I show you the pictures of ....
One thing is true about Alzheimer's behaviors...this too shall pass. Sometimes I wish my mom could still tell me she wants to o home ;-) Hang in there!
You are doing the right thing about selling Mom's house now. It's less complicated now then later on. The equity can help pay for her care, and no more worrying about an empty house and everything that goes along with it.
It's difficult for me to lie to her she remembers last weeks conversation but cant remember what she had for breakfast!
It's hard to know what she'll do or how she'll react