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The BLIZZARD dumped two feet of snow. I live an hour away from mom. On Monday the snow plow came down her street. I found someone to shovel her house. Told them shovel driveway also. Therapist arranged for mom to get pain pills from doctor. She had them sent to drugstore five minutes drive from house. Brother had said he was going out later. I call mom to tell her. She says brother can't get car out. So I call doctor office to get pills transferred to place that delivers. The Secretary says she didn't know that doctor had prescribed pills yet. So I tell her to have prescription sent to pharmacy that delivers cause brother can't get out of house. Turns out doctor had sent prescription to drugstore down the street. They call therapist seven a clock at night to say no one came to pick up prescription. Don't know why pharmacy had her phone number. She calls me all upset, talking fast, raised voice. Why wasn't prescription picked up? I explained about brother not getting car out. And sending prescription to other place. When I said Walgreens she said shedding you send it to the one a few minutes from house ? Instead one 20 minutes away. I had to say the one close by doesn't deliver. Now I'm hoping the truck can make it to the house with the meds today. Mom has torn Roger cuff and lymphedema in same arm. She uses a walker. Brother won't help much.She is 89 and he won't even do the dishes or cook for her. She has been in extreme pain for weeks. Cause of kidney disease doctors wouldn't prescribe pain meds except over the counter. That don't work. I'm trying not to feel guilty about the delay in getting mom pain meds. I pray she gets the meds today.

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Blizzards need a lot of advance planning. I live near Buffalo--nobody delivers anything in a blizzard. A drugstore a block away may as well be on the moon. A driving ban was likely in place as well, so NO driving means NO driving. Up here, we stock up on toilet paper and beer; you can survive for a week with only that on hand. It cleanses the kidneys and kills the pain.
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I think lots of people's plans were foiled and things gone without because of that blizzard... I agree, it's a good reminder about advance planning, I thought I'd done so but hadn't completely. Hope your mom is feeling better now!
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I agree that you need to relax on this one. Life happens. I am a therapist and do want my patients to get pain meds they need but never get involved in their delivery to this point. I feel families do their best, be it snow, work, life, and this is not my problem to solve. Icing is a great alternative, if a patient is able to manage using an ice pack or making one of frozen peas, etc. Elevation of the arm above the heart is also very helpful.
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One good solution for your problem is to let a problem calls go to voicemail or an answering machine. Another solution is that if the physical therapist is being unprofessional and not understanding, then maybe you should suggest that the therapist go pick up the prescription themselves under the conditions of the blizzard you described among other problems. This is how I would handle it because I don't take no crap from no one because I tell them like it is. If the problem caller persists to argue with you, you do have the option of hanging up, so just hang up and not talk to them any further. another thing I suggest is calling the Better Business Bureau in that area where the problem is
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OTJenn, thanks for your answer as therapist. The rest of the answers are good, too.

I know how tricky medications can be when it comes to keeping up needed supplies. Since I live in a blizzard prone area, I have always had a mentality that I need to plan ahead for times when we can't get out.

Hadnuff, you've contributed so much to this community. I'm glad that you could vent your frustrations and I sincerely hope that you didn't let guilt get you down. No matter how well we plan, things beyond our control happen. That is life.
Even the most dedicated caregiver cannot always have everything prepared perfectly so that all bases are covered at all times.

I still remember times when I "failed" my loved ones and endure some guilt - followed by a nudge from my sister to take my own advice. We are not God. We do our best. In your case, as in most, everyone lived through it. Bless you for caring so much. Relax and move forward - and take care of the caregiver. Shove guilt out the door.
Carol
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Blizzard or not, the therapist is not sounding very professional.
Attempt to move through this & take the higher road.
YOU'LL WILL BE BETTER FOR IT.
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Good thing there was a blizzard or your mother would have been given pain meds which her kidneys cannot handle. I can barely understand this rambling story, and don't know what a "Roger" cuff is, unless you mean a rotator cuff. Since your brother won't help her there is no point of you getting upset when Mother nature gets involved. Pain is subjective, and more people in this country are addicted to pain meds than need to be. If one lets the body heal itself then there is no need for narcotics. The mind is really powerful in turning off pain.
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Hadnuff; you did your best from afar, which is where you live. YOUR MOTHER won't make things better by moving someplace where there are professionals on staff and medication could be at hand, not have to be sent for. The fact that your mother could not get pain relief in the middle of a blizzard is NOT YOUR FAULT. Don't beat yourself up; the therapist doesn't know the back story.
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"I'm doing the best I can within the confines of a very dysfunctional family situation. If there's anything you can do to help, that would be lovely. My mother has been in pain for weeks now andvthe doctor has FINALLY decided to prescribe. If mom is in pain for another day, it's not an emergency. If it is, from your professional viewpoint, please call 911 and have mom taken to the ER, and have them call me".
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I agree, the therapist was unprofessional. I would have her name removed as a contact. There is no reason for her to have anything to do with patients meds other than knowing what the patient is taking. Makes me suspicious that her name was listed as a contact. Her job is therapy. I would call her employer and talk to the head nurse. Tell her what happen and that her phone number was a contact for meds. It has happened where a health provider has stolen patients meds. Maybe thats why the reaction. I live in NJ and we got 13in and it drifted in places. We were on alert not to drive. Also took two days for people to dig out because it was wet.
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The therapist got involved because she cared about mom. I believe. And a reqest for pain meds coming from a professional probably would carry more weight with the doctor than from me. Her daughter. Especially since she is there working with her. Mom has wanted prescription pain meds. And even raisedher voice at the orthopedist doctor. Saying she needed pain relief. And none of the cream or over the counter meds work at all.
I'm calmer now and less upset. And I do realize that mom being in so much pain a few more days isnt the world. Especially since moms situation doesn't have to be as bad as it is. She could let me hire a woman to help her and to make meals and do dishes. She refuses.
Therapist name got on pharmacy contact list by accident. Mom wont answer phone. She is or was being harased. Long story. She didnt want caller ID or. answering machine. So doctor office has to call me to get message to mom. But therapist gave her phone number to doctor office. And Secretary looked at wrong number when she called in prescription. Oh, I call mom and ring three times. Then hang up and ring three times again. Then hang up. Mom then calls me back.
This has been going on for awhile.
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Barbara, NOT YOUR FAULT. Gkad that you are calmer now. I'm sure the therapist is as frustrated with this situation as you are, which is why it's important to explain this calmly to her. Don't be denfensive, as though there is something else you should be doing. Be well and stay safe.
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From reading past posts involving the PT, I imagine she is frustrated with this particular case. No reason to be unprofessional but she was. If you want her to continue working with your mother let it go. If not - call her supervisor and request a new PT.
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I don't think there is any way that you could consider this situation to be your own fault; you tried your best but the weather situation, which no one can control, was against you. These things do happen, we're not supermen or women, but I think we're also way too hard on ourselves most of the time.
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I would love her to keep working with mom. But Im waiting to find out if she can.
Friday she was to see mom but had to cancel her appointment. She fell and thought she broke part of her foot. She called me on the way to the doctors office. She is supposed to call tonight to tell me if she can go back to work on Monday. It is nice to feel like ther is someone else looking out for mom. And can help me get mom what she needs. Meds or her opinion if pain clinic might help. No to be completely alone in trying to help mom.
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They can only work so long with a patient. If not showing improvement Medicare won't pay. I now understand where ur coming from. Maybe she wasn't upset with u but ur brother since he is the closest.
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My understanding regarding the PT is there has been a miscommunication or two. Brother is there but doesn't seem able to coordinate things and hadnuff does everything by telephone. Mom isn't able to help herself...This situation certainly has the ingredients for a complicated scenario.
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Good heavens, Blizzard Jonas was a terrible mess in our area. As someone else had mentioned, NO DRIVING, means NO DRIVING. The road crews had their hands full and didn't need people out on the road.

Hadnuff, in fact, I was surprised that your Mom's doctor and his/her staff was even in the office, and that the drug stores was even opened. Monday was still a mess and local/State governments were asking people to please keep off the roads. The fact that your brother couldn't get his car speaks volumes as to what the conditions were. So stop feeling guilty.

I try to keep one step ahead for my Dad as he waits until he is staring up into a pill bottle only to find it empty to let me know he is out of pills. I learned not to enable him by rushing out and getting the prescription re-filled, as missing a couple of days isn't going to hurt him.

As for pain, Dad has knee issues at 94 years old, told him use the Aspercreme until I can get his prescription refilled. I am not going to risk my life for a tube of creme.
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We can not control the weather!! I always try to remember to keep a few pills out of the prescriptions and keep back for such a emergency. If not used after so long--I take them and start all over again. This has been a bad year for extreme weather!! I personally wish that more pharmacies delivered prescriptions .If it's not a life threatening illness---we have to depend on GOD to take care of us until weather conditions clear up. I usually try and stay up more on the weather all year around when I'm on the computer! I have both AccuWeather, and TWC on my computer so I can check it out easier and stay ahead of it! I'm 72 and have to use a walker. I was also in a tornado back in 73'. Just pays to be more aware--I think anyway. I've always got enough food on hand to last at least a couple weeks.
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wwpwin, good idea about keeping a few pills on the side just in case... and keeping on hand at least a couple weeks worth of food :)

I stocked up Dad's place, even though he now lives in independent/assisted living and gets supper in the main dining room, he has to fend for himself for breakfast and lunch if his Caregivers can't make it in [and they didn't because of the blizzard]. Didn't want him to run out of milk, bread, toilet paper and especially Depends. He did ok. He was more interested in where was the daily newspaper.... priorities!
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I don't like the sound of this therapist! Get another one.
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IMHO, how does MOM feel about the therapist and one poster suggested healthcare providers, and I am not accusing your PT by any means, may have an opiate addiction. I would just ask Mom how she likes the PT and is she taking her meds as prescribed. Blizzards and other stuff happens. Not your fault, you seem to be doing your best and that is all we can do.
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Mom really likes the therapist. She feels she is a nice person and competant therapist. I like her also. The reason she got involved with drugs for mom is that two doctors wouldn't perscribe perception pain meds. The othopedist and the internist. Mom was in terrible pain for weeks. No over the counter drugs helped. And icy hot made her pain worse. Perscription cream made her dizzy and didn't
work. Therapist called doctor to try to get mom the pain relief she needed. Mom always wanted the pills even before she ever saw the therapist for the first time.
Mom has kidney disease. So doctors said try physical therapy. Maybe a shot later. Surgery as a last resort.
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Doctors...you have to watch them too! She has been prescribed pain meds now, as I understand it, so that is a good thing. We all have our doctor horror stories too, mine was the opposite. Mom in the hospital taking 5mg of percocet every 6 hours, then when they transferred her to rehab they gave her a 40 milligram oxycontin. She was messed and literally stoned for two days! Oxys are a time release medication, and mom had a very low tolerance for any RX. . Thinking back, I should have reported that as an egregious medical error to the state. Hope your mom has the pain relief she needs now. Just awful.
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