Hi! I’m just reaching out. Been struggling as my husband is in a long term care facility and as most know, the past 2 months they are not allowing visitors. I totally understand as in there was a massive outbreak in the facility. Husband got it. He survived. He lives in NJ, a covid 19 hotspot.
I agree with banning restrictions. They are telling me they are likely to resume once the country gets back to “normal” phase 3 or once the vaccine comes. Months to year?
I'm reaching out to see how others are coping. Communication with staff is impossible. They did not share covid 19 diagnosis until weeks later. So I’m not confident or trusting.
Is it possible no visits for year? Besides FaceTime and looking through the window (which they won’t allow) any creative ways to connect.
My husband is end stage Parkinson’s non verbal so on a good day communication is tough. I read him non verbally in-person. Not easy in the phone. He can’t speak,
I'm just sad and looking for hope or perspective. Safety is priority. My heart can’t take him feeling lonely isolated and more confused. He doesn’t understand why we won’t visit. Thank you. Be well.
My mother's memory care facility has started something called GrandGrams which are a way to email your loved one as often as you like. My mom also has macular degeneration and can't see to read the emails, but they read them to her and send me photos of her holding the emails. We attach pictures of everything from the grandchildren to my garden, to the cat (LOTS of cat pictures!).
Perhaps you can ask if your husband's place will consider setting up something like that.
The entire situation is heartbreaking I know, but I try to accept it as it is, knowing I have no control whatsoever and whatever will be will be, as cold as that sounds. It's the only way I can stay afloat during these awful times. I'll be thinking of you and wishing you peace.
Francine
My mom had just moved ALiving a few weeks prior to lockdown, so she never really adjusted, since things changed daily for awhile. She had a contact with a covid positive staff that handed out meds, and was even further isolated, no well checks, just necessary visits wearing mask gown goggles and gloves, which really freaked her out. Once 14 days over yesterday, I brought her home until things are less isolating. Her mixed dementia symptoms seemed to accelerate daily. She wasn't sleeping much, just upset all the time. Have to pay to hold her place, even though, they have suspended move ins at this time
,
Between the hearing and dementia, we did not set her up with a phone either. So, it is what it is. No way to get to see her really. The facility has offerings to contact a person about, but nice as they may be, mom won't really understand and is not likely to be able to hear. Very often when visiting I would have to write things down or she wouldn't understand.
They have sent pix, she seems happy, so that's comforting. One was during bingo after a little tumble, and she looked happier than I am! At that point it was closing in on 2 months unable to buy TP!!!! It's also about 2 years that I had already been in the same kind of "lock down" mode, just because of financial issues, not illness, but just what this was changing, along came a virus, that sat down beside us... :-(
His facility hasn’t had any cases of the Coronavirus. I feel so bad for those who do. Peace and strength to everyone here.
Be strong!
ktsmom
See All Answers