My Dad has very high level demetia, he needs to be reminded where he is every day. He's in the VA with men much worse than he, and I'm working to find him something closer to us in a private place. Once in a while he remembers home and wants to be there. What are his legal rights since he hasn't been declared legally incompetent. I'd rather not spend time and money on lawyers and I don't think it matters, we have DPOA which works in our state for almost everything and as long as he is in a locked ward he is automatically incompetent. But if I find him a nice place where he isn't locked up, are we in danger of someone believing him if he wants to leave there? I'm not sure exactly why I'm asking, we are doing the best we can for him, and I'm wondering about this. We feel just a little guilty about not bringing him home but only a tiny bit because we have other disabled people at home and he would cause suffering for us all, and I think we can make him happy in a really great place that we can afford. It would be nice to not spend the $60k a year on outside care, but it is really best for all. Just wondering what the courts would think - not that it would ever come up.
My grandpa is planning to "break out" at his NH -- on one level we know they won't let that happen, but when you are in a constant state of worrying about someone for years, it's hard to switch gears.