Are you sure you want to exit? Your progress will be lost.
Who are you caring for?
Which best describes their mobility?
How well are they maintaining their hygiene?
How are they managing their medications?
Does their living environment pose any safety concerns?
Fall risks, spoiled food, or other threats to wellbeing
Are they experiencing any memory loss?
Which best describes your loved one's social life?
Acknowledgment of Disclosures and Authorization
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment. You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
✔
I acknowledge and authorize
✔
I consent to the collection of my consumer health data.*
✔
I consent to the sharing of my consumer health data with qualified home care agencies.*
*If I am consenting on behalf of someone else, I have the proper authorization to do so. By clicking Get My Results, you agree to our Privacy Policy. You also consent to receive calls and texts, which may be autodialed, from us and our customer communities. Your consent is not a condition to using our service. Please visit our Terms of Use. for information about our privacy practices.
Mostly Independent
Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
Remember, this assessment is not a substitute for professional advice.
Share a few details and we will match you to trusted home care in your area:
They have been married 42 yrs. I tried to tell her that I felt like he was lonely and was mistaken this for friendship, she will not believe me. He has been here for almost a yr and this is just now happening. I take her to see him 3 times a week.
Oh your poor mom !!! That would be devastating - no matter how much you remind her about his dementia. I feel your pain - and hers. Even though it's not "correct" I would remind him that his thoughts are not right and that his brain is not working correctly. Perhaps that will save your mom's feelings. He'll forget anyway. What a dilemma :(
This question is missing some important details such as a dementia diagnosis. I have seen this before and it is difficult for a spouse to understand. I assume he is in a nursing facility and foremost, you have placed him there because he needed more care that could be offered at home to keep him safe. The nursing staff are responsible to provide care and many become very closely attached to their patients. After all, you would rather he feel loved than hate every minute of every day because he was in a facility. I would suggest you talk with Social Services and have a meeting with the nurse in question to explain your concerns. The facility should be able to make some adjustments and if the nurse is aware, she should be take efforts to be professional and keep friendships in proper order. If dementia is an issue, I have seen men (and women) who don't realize how old they are and think of themselves as younger person. It's not their fault, but it is still difficult for families to understand. Again, I suggest talking to Social Services at the facility. They will help counsel your mother and since it's coming from a medical professional, she may accept the answer better. I wish you the best!
One of my dear neighbors had Alzheimer's. At some point he was placed in a nursing home. While there he "fell in love with and planned to marry" another patient. His wife just laughed at the entire situation.
My poor neighbor was a really cute and sweet man. Very nice. Married for a 100 years to his wife. She was able to realize that the man she married was long gone.
Another neighbor's mom started showing signs of Alzheimer's as well. But before she could be treated for that she developed leukemia. Just before she passed she told my neighbor, her daughter, what a hussy she was and how great her son in law was. Just broke my neighbor's heart. Her mother would never have said or thought anything of the sort if she had been in her right mind. This was not her mom speaking.
We have to remember this could someday be us and would we want to be held responsible for the crazy things we say or do due to dementia or Alzheimer's? I know i don't.
There's a male nurse at my mother's NH and when he deals with her she bats her eyelashes, giggles and flirts with him. In her demented state she doesn't see that he's VERY VERY openly gay. Makes me chuckle but it's sad really. Of course she bad mouths the female nurses all the time.
There's a sweet movie called "Away from Her," with Julie Christie, about a couple dealing with the wife's Alzheimer's and her "falling in love" with another resident of her nursing facility. I don't know if it would help your mother to see it, but it might help you.
My friend (male) had a 94 yr old dad who a a traumatic brain injury from a fall on his tiles in the home. I also smashed my patella there helping his 93 yr old mom move out of the same house and fell in the same area. Trivia crap. Daddio ended up in the hospital, flirted with all the nurses, told me he would marry me but he still had a wife. I stayed with him when he was dying, stroked his head and we had eye contact, he did look fairly peaceful. Stayed for an hour for someone to pronounce him, his own son had left immediately. Still thankful, wasn't home from HS yet when my dad died and was very grateful for the chance to be at the right place at the right time.
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
Even though it's not "correct" I would remind him that his thoughts are not right and that his brain is not working correctly. Perhaps that will save your mom's feelings. He'll forget anyway. What a dilemma :(
If dementia is an issue, I have seen men (and women) who don't realize how old they are and think of themselves as younger person. It's not their fault, but it is still difficult for families to understand. Again, I suggest talking to Social Services at the facility. They will help counsel your mother and since it's coming from a medical professional, she may accept the answer better. I wish you the best!
My poor neighbor was a really cute and sweet man. Very nice. Married for a 100 years to his wife. She was able to realize that the man she married was long gone.
Another neighbor's mom started showing signs of Alzheimer's as well. But before she could be treated for that she developed leukemia. Just before she passed she told my neighbor, her daughter, what a hussy she was and how great her son in law was. Just broke my neighbor's heart. Her mother would never have said or thought anything of the sort if she had been in her right mind. This was not her mom speaking.
We have to remember this could someday be us and would we want to be held responsible for the crazy things we say or do due to dementia or Alzheimer's? I know i don't.