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Who are you caring for?
Which best describes their mobility?
How well are they maintaining their hygiene?
How are they managing their medications?
Does their living environment pose any safety concerns?
Fall risks, spoiled food, or other threats to wellbeing
Are they experiencing any memory loss?
Which best describes your loved one's social life?
Acknowledgment of Disclosures and Authorization
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment. You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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Mostly Independent
Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
Remember, this assessment is not a substitute for professional advice.
Share a few details and we will match you to trusted home care in your area:
Sorry to hear about your mean siblings. Its hard when everyone gets so entrenched in their views. I know I was stubborn as well. I was angry at my siblings for not being in my mom and dad's lives and not offering to help more.
With past issues, its always harder to move forward. I would try writing a letter to your siblings and tell them how much you love your mom and would like to be included in her medical updates. Start by saying you all love your mom and given her age, you just want to cooperate and ensure mom gets the best care. I know its not easy but give it a try. Keep reaching out.
Maybe consider consulting a counselor. Maybe family therapist or a mediator could help with your siblings.
There's no fixing mean siblings. Visit your mom and do the things you can with her while she is here. These precious times will be your reward after she is gone. I did not see my mom for 2 years due to her manipulation. When she fell that did it for me. I was there until the end. I'm so glad I did. Those 3 years have meant more to me than anything and no one can take that away from me. In the end, mom and I both knew we loved each other very much. I'm so thankful for the time I had with her.
I wonder if you have tried visiting your mom, sending her cards, bringing her cheer in the NH. Unless you observe some kind of abuse or neglect of her while there, I'd think that being supportive of her would be sufficient as her child. Normally, the POA and HCPOA are responsible for monitoring the LO's medical condition, treatment, meds. I'd try to stay supportive and see how things go. Maybe, time will heal. I don't see how insisting on being in control would help your situation, especially on mending with siblings. I'd try to look at from their perspective.
If you are the caretaker be sure you or an independent professional has POA and Health advocate authority. It will help when dealing with siblings. Otherwise do not take the role if another sibling has the power.
My mom had a stroke about 6 month ago. She is doing very well. She is 91, and due to her age it was best for nursing home. The nursing home she is in doesn't not have a good reputation. I was not in her life for about 12 yrs due to her manipulation meanness. Since the strong I have had a very good relationship. . It's the siblings. I'm the youngest, only one that is educated and in the medical field. Because I've asked to see her medicine,and keep tabs on nurses. I was told by my siblings to stay out. I was not in her life for along time and who do I think I am! They do not include me in anything. My feeling is I know my mom loves me and enjoys our time. It's just hard dealing with them.
Amarie, please give us more information. Example, what are your Mother's health issues? How old is she? How long has she been in the nursing home? Why is she there?
Have your siblings always been mean? Are you still close to the family? When was the last time you spoke or saw your Mom?
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
Sorry to hear about your mean siblings. Its hard when everyone gets so entrenched in their views. I know I was stubborn as well. I was angry at my siblings for not being in my mom and dad's lives and not offering to help more.
With past issues, its always harder to move forward. I would try writing a letter to your siblings and tell them how much you love your mom and would like to be included in her medical updates. Start by saying you all love your mom and given her age, you just want to cooperate and ensure mom gets the best care. I know its not easy but give it a try. Keep reaching out.
Maybe consider consulting a counselor. Maybe family therapist or a mediator could help with your siblings.
Don't waste time fighting with them. Go see your mother and interact with her as you see fit. It will be to your credit to not start fights.
If you don't have POA, don't try to get it. Just enjoy what time you have left with mom and ignore the sibs.
I was not in her life for about 12 yrs due to her manipulation meanness.
Since the strong I have had a very good relationship. . It's the siblings. I'm the youngest, only one that is educated and in the medical field.
Because I've asked to see her medicine,and keep tabs on nurses. I was told by my siblings to stay out. I was not in her life for along time and who do I think I am! They do not include me in anything.
My feeling is I know my mom loves me and enjoys our time. It's just hard dealing with them.
Have your siblings always been mean? Are you still close to the family? When was the last time you spoke or saw your Mom?