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I have trouble understanding some of the things he is saying to me. It seems he whispers some stories in a rather dramatic way. Is this common, or is it my hearing? He badgers me if I ask him to repeat very many things. Not pleasant!
Please check to make sure its not a UTI.My mom passed recently and the dr.thought it was start of dementia, here she was getting urinary infections which have the same signs.I have never heard of either causing lowering of voice.Good Luck.Shame our parents never teach us how to handle these things when we are young.
Alexander4, I don't know if that is common in all kinds of dementia, but it certainly is in Lewy Body Dementia (which my husband had.) Speech therapy helped a lot. He didn't remember to do what the therapist taught him all the time, but I could remind him and that would help for a while.
Have you discussed this with your loved one's doctor? Ask if speech therapy might help.
I have no idea if it's common with Dementia patients or not. But my Momma appears to be horse a lot of times as if she talked loudly for days, when she has always been soft spoken all of her life. Did he ever go see a ENT (Ears, Nose and Throat Specialist)? Momma has seasonal allergies and takes a allergy pill a day which controls her sneezing....but it doesn't do anything for her hoarsness. Keep asking questions to his doctor and in here. I hope you find your answers.
I like the suggestions about seeing an ENT and also speech therapy if he's having trouble speaking. However, you mentioned that he seemed to be telling stories in a dramatic fashion. Is he really talking to you or is he just reliving an even for himself? If he's just reliving an event, then there's no need for you to ask him to repeat it. I'd just let it be.
my dad's voice had also reduced to a gravely whisper. The VA sent him to speech therapy using the LSVT Loud training. Here's a video on the effectiveness below. It made a huge difference in our interaction. Sometimes he will revert to whispering. When that happens we simply say, " use your LOUD voice". the therapist said that it's a bit of a cycle. They get used to not speaking up. People don't hear them so they don't speak up. Then they get used to not being heard. I asked my dad and he agreed that because it sometimes takes a while for him to process what's being said or asked of him he doesn't speak because the relevance of his comments has passed by the time he gets the words right. So, he just says nothing at all. Not using his voice lowers the volume.
I can only tell you that my husband who has Parkinson's and is starting to get dementia speaks very softly. Most people complain about not being able to hear him. I have been told that with Parkinson's their hearing is more acute and they think they are talking louder when in fact they are speaking softly. There is therapy that actually encourages them to yell to be able to practice speaking louder. I do totally agree with Vecharo.
My mom had Lewy body with parkinsins. As her speach declined, her voice became softer until she finally stopped speaking in sentences. She would say yes or no or tea or juice, just one word answers to questions. However if you asked her if she wanted to say the Hail Mary or our father prayers, she would say every word!
My mother was always at least a moderate volume speaker and really got loud with a few glasses of wine. Now it's a whisper and if I ask her to speak louder she almost yells "OK!" but then goes back to whisper next time she says anything. So, is it the dementia or is it something else. No UTI. She is very healthy "otherwise" I think it must be fairly common to lose volume with dementia and maybe also with advanced age.
My husband who is in the late stages of dementia, does the same thing. I can't hear what he's saying most of the time and seems to be telling stories. I just say yes to whatever he's telling me. This seems to satisfy him.
I don't know if it's true for all dementia patients, but it's certainly true of my mom. Sometimes I have to put my ear way down to her mouth to hear what she's saying.
Yes, it is common! My mother got to the point where she would speak another language almost. I could not understand her. Her final stage was just moans, could not swallow, and stopped walking.
My wife doesn't talk when I first show up at her facility but then mumbles quite low. I take her to Speech Therapy and then she opens up. It is amazing to me that she then speaks in complete, grammatically correct sentences. Afterwards, it is back to the silent treatment. She may have NPH but not sure at this time. She knows the words to many songs and sings them. The S.T. can get her to associate many words, like opposites, and can finish many sentences. Afterwards its back to the silent treatment. It may be just me; I don't know. She is a PhD in mathematics and she can still count and do addition. So much for the PhD. Dementia is horrible but one just has to swing with it or go crazy.
My husband also does this. He has dementia and parkinsonism. Also has a habit of putting his hand in front of his mouth when he is talking which makes it even more difficult to hear. I've tried to tell him to put his hands down so I can hear him but that just makes him angry and he tells me I need a hearing aid. Oh well.
Since I personally knew two of them, I would definitely have to say no on this one. Their voice volumes definitely didn't change a single bit, in fact, one of them actually got a little bit louder since he couldn't really hear too well and he wore to hearing aids. The other persons voice also didn't change a single bet, that person had their normal voice volume. Everything I know about these two people is exactly why I must say no to losing one's voice volume because it isn't necessarily true in dementia patients because from what I've noticed, dementia actually affects people differently
Based on answers above, I'd surmise this reduced speaking volume IS common among people with dementia. But certainly my mother -- who has dementia "consistent with Alzheimer's" -- has grown much more soft-spoken during the latter stage(s). And I think vecharo's suggestions were especially helpful!
Volume will be decreased when there is pressure bearing on the diaphragm, the person has COPD, sore throat, or many things. If they wear hearing aids maybe they think they are yelling the words. Try having him write down what he is saying (if he can still write and understand what he is writing), but don't get stressed or angry. That won't help either of you. Just do the best you can and hope that is enough. Best wishes!
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
Have you discussed this with your loved one's doctor? Ask if speech therapy might help.
It's all in the context of when he does this.
Take care,
Carol
whispers
====
simple answer yes
Some also speak in alphabet soup
loose and mix words and their meanings
loose the ability to speak
the therapist said that it's a bit of a cycle. They get used to not speaking up. People don't hear them so they don't speak up. Then they get used to not being heard. I asked my dad and he agreed that because it sometimes takes a while for him to process what's being said or asked of him he doesn't speak because the relevance of his comments has passed by the time he gets the words right. So, he just says nothing at all. Not using his voice lowers the volume.