I am 24/7 caregiver for mom. No one else even sends her a card or calls. She put me as beneficiary of a life annunity. She was told by broker that this would not go into probate. If something happens to her, do I have to tell estranged parties I received this. If it is contested who pays attorneys fees. I have devoted my life, left my career and am giving my mom the best final years of her life. They do not care but will probably show up with hands out.
She also set up a joint checkng account with me many years ago (we are very close) I do not misuse her money - but could a court make me go back and reaccount. I pay for things for her on my credit cards and cash. We have just all thrown it together for years. She is living with me for the past 6 years. Not paying rent or caregiving. She is older now and requires 24/7 caregiving. Not to mention the dirty laundry, stress, etc. I love her dearly and am not in it for the money. She demanded to have it put in my name because it came from my step dad (to her) and I cared for him. I'm stressed out enough now don't want a court issue later. Although, I am the only one deserving. Not like it is a fortune or anything.
I pray your brother doesn't do what you fear. If he is mentally disturbed, be careful.
I just found this site this weekend. I have -0- connection to them. I just think they are a great site - like this one is!
I want to share a great, inexpensive legal resource. I am spelling it out so it will not be nixed by the moderators. lawgurudotcom
I fear my brother, the one who wrote the weird email I posted yesterday, may decide to fly in for the burial (if he does) and clean out the joint account we hold with Mom. I don't say this lightly. His anger over not being named POA or in charge of Moms Will was what caused our estrangement in the first place. Also, I have learned from reliable sources that he has been under psychiatric care for erractic behavior (I will spare the details) for somke time, and was court-ordered into a psych ward for 10 days not too far back. (This truly breaks my heart but I can't deal with that just now).
Anyway, for $50 I had an online legal consult with an attorney in GA (where the assets are), who advised me to pronto move the money into an account in my name only. Keep copious records, he said, but do it. And so I will.
This site is different from others where you can pay for advice, as this site offers lawyers in YOUR state (this is vital as all state law is different), lawyers that specialize in certains areas (Elder care, probate, wills, etc), a true, confidential, attorney-client privilege, and does constitute legitimate legal advice. (They are also fully acredited by the BBB) Having worked in the courts for 10 yrs - I was extremely pleased with this service, and it cost me considerably less time and money than flying down to Georgia to talk to a lawyer would have taken.
So I pass it on. Hope you don't need such a service but it you do, check it out - Oh, and you don't pay til you're satisfied - if you don't like the 1st lawyer or answer you get, you can run through them all and yet only have to pay the one price.
Also golfhard - is Mom still mentally competent? If so, she can change her will - you can even find a lawyer to come to the house and/or you can do a "caregiver agreement" that spells out her wishes.
Let us know what happens. Good luck. Many of us have similar issues and truly feel your pain.
You don't want ugly stuff thrown at you after all that you've done.
Take care,
Carol