He has received radiation on all cancer areas and hormonal shot therapy. He had a five artery bypass heart surgery about fifteen years ago and three major strokes about ten years ago. I know he wants to come home but my mom is 76 yr old and will not be able to care for him. What should we do now.
You can get a second opinion and make sure that they are not just assuming your Dad's life is low quality and not worth it vs there being no chemo that would work that he would tolerate.
We always want to hope there might be something other that might help.
There MIGHT be potential alternative therapies, including nutritional, and numerous other options, which MIGHT help improve quality of life, if not help stop the progression of the disease. Sometimes, it's hard to determine what might be the best options, which might need input from someone familiar with those, who can help sort out what might be better than others.
Might want to check out "Cancer, the Emperor of all Maladies" 3-part documentary on Netflix. MUCH information, especially in the last segment, talking about immune-therapy--which is still too commonly never done, even now.
If you want more information about possible alternatives, send me a "hug" here, and I can share what I know/have experienced/witnessed....no promises, no sales, just information/education.
Meanwhile, Please follow up on the Hospice.
It sounds like he could sure use it, and so could you.
Hospice was a great help with my Mom's last spouse; I've heard only good from anyone who's had the misfortune to need them.
patient should have a diagnosis that is likely to end their life in six months or less. There are set benefit periods and at the end of each the hospice team will review the patients condition and if they are no longer appropriate in terms of their illness they will be discharged, however their is no bar to readmission should the condition worsen. This is solely related to the illness not how much help is required for the patient in the home. Extra help such as aides or physical therapy has to be obtained through other sources as does any equipment hospice provided such as a bed or oxygen. This is only an inconvenience because these things will now be prescribed by the PCG and the company supplying them may be different but they will still be available.
As far as the original poster's father is concerned now as others have said is the time to enjoy whatever time he has left and no longer try and make him do things "that are good for him" decline any tests for which you would not be a candidate for treatment anyway. help the the patient achieve any goals they have such as visiting certain places and seeing loved ones and patching up old quarrels. The spiritual part is also very important so give the patient access to a spiritual advisor of his choice preferably one he is familiar with of his own faith. Medications are no longer very important, except to control pain and things like nausea, depression or anxiety. It is important to have enough support for the caregiving who is often also elderly and overwhelmed on many fronts.
I'd really like to know more about this change, JoAnn. Can you suggest where to look?
Grace + peace,
Bob
I would also contact your closest Gilda's Club and join, whether you join or your father does. You'll get a lot of support from this organization.
And contact the CURE magazine or visit the website and start reading some of its diversified articles. I would provide the website URL but the last time I did the Admins deleted it. So Google CURE, cancer magazine. I've found this magazine very helpful. Some of the articles are very technical; some are very practical.
Angel
There is a time for all of us when we need to re-focus our thoughts on how to live the life we have left rather than chase after another treatment that won't work but will make the person receiving it miserable. It sounds as if the doctor is wise enough to see this.
If your family has a spiritual background, now may be the time to call on the pastor or Rabbi for some help. It definitely sounds like a time for the family to focus on love and life which facing the reality that your father's life is limited.
I apologize if I'm misreading your question but if I understand it right, my advice is to focus on making the next months about your father's life and comfort.
Take care of yourself, too.
Carol
Hearing that news is hard. You have options. I suggest you find a social services advisor. Hospice sounds appreciate at this time. Quality of life and pain management for your father;along with respite for you and your mom. Aging Life Care Professionals ( Geriatric Care Manager) maybe helpful as well.
Grace + Peace,
Bob
As FF says, at-home care or self-pay or Medicaid nursing home care. The only question is whether palliative care or hospice is appropriate.
I am very sorry. It's hard...
If your Dad isn't mobile enough to help with his own daily routine, then it is time to hire paid caregivers to come in to help, or time to place Dad in a continuing care facility under self-pay or Medicaid. Sad that he is going through all that, he is still pretty young by today's standards.