Are you sure you want to exit? Your progress will be lost.
Who are you caring for?
Which best describes their mobility?
How well are they maintaining their hygiene?
How are they managing their medications?
Does their living environment pose any safety concerns?
Fall risks, spoiled food, or other threats to wellbeing
Are they experiencing any memory loss?
Which best describes your loved one's social life?
Acknowledgment of Disclosures and Authorization
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment. You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
✔
I acknowledge and authorize
✔
I consent to the collection of my consumer health data.*
✔
I consent to the sharing of my consumer health data with qualified home care agencies.*
*If I am consenting on behalf of someone else, I have the proper authorization to do so. By clicking Get My Results, you agree to our Privacy Policy. You also consent to receive calls and texts, which may be autodialed, from us and our customer communities. Your consent is not a condition to using our service. Please visit our Terms of Use. for information about our privacy practices.
Mostly Independent
Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
Remember, this assessment is not a substitute for professional advice.
Share a few details and we will match you to trusted home care in your area:
My husband and I moved in with my parents to care for them in 2019. I lost my husband to Covid last year....I am still here on my own now caring for them. Is there a set % that an executor receives from the settlement of estate???
Lakemama, to be paid as the Executor of your parent's Will, it has to be mentioned in the Will. Being you are the daughter, I would assume you would get what is in the Estate, or will you be sharing it with siblings and/or other family members?
I was the Executor of my parent's Will, never even thought about asking for a fee as I would be inheriting their estate.
Since your Mom has Alzheimer's/dementia she would be unable to change her Will. Your Dad can have his Will updated to mention a fee for being the Executor.
Different states have diffferent guidelines for the executor receiving monetary compensation for time spent on the estate 'work'.
Often, the 'non executors' get angry b/c all they see is one kids getting 'more' than they are. But they don't see the behind the scenes work that goes into settling an estate.
My mother died on Sunday of this week. Her FPOA son immediately became executor and the look on his face when I said that to him was one of terror. Of course we are all helping, but he is doing the lion's share and after only 3 days, he is burned out. BUT, I did say to him, in the presence of the other sibs that he needs to keep track of his hours and charge the estate the going rate (which I think is now $30 per hour).
SO MANY little ticky tacky things to deal with. We are all helping but the final say goes right to him.
As much as YB would LOVE to be in control of this--he isn't the executor and his 'voice' has no more power than mine or my sisters'.
My Dh and I both did hundreds of hours of work for his dad's estate and my BIL kicked up such an enormous fuss over everything that we simply did not take a dime. Wasn't worth the family drama. I'm sorry to say I still struggle with the grasping relative who jumped in and took everything of value and demanded an accounting of everything--obviously not trusting my incredibly trustworthy husband.
At least we know what to expect when DH's mom passes. More of the same.
You don't HAVE to take the 'fee' but you are certainly entitled to it.
As executor 4x there is a critical point in time when all of the pieces come together at one time. The last one I did was with sale, cleaning and closing a house within 6 weeks, plus trying to close a small business. One week took 60 hours of my time.....and then everything suddenly went away
The Executor is named in the Will and in my State the Executor gets a % of the estate according to the law. And that all depends on the final accting of the estate. Debts and liens must be paid first. The net worth of the Estate is where the % due comes in. In my State it starts at 4% to a certain cap, lets say 200k. The Executor gets 8,000 off the top. The balance is split between the beneficiaries. As the Estates worth goes up, the % received by the Executor goes diwn. The lowest amount they can receive is 2%. So on a million dollars the Executor gets 40,000.
When I probated my Moms Estate I was asked if I would be taking my fee and I said no. It shows up in the final accting. The accting shows what each beneficiary will receive on the bottom line. This is where you contest the findings. My brothers turned over to me some shares worth about 5k that Mom had, the one reason why I didn't take the fee. I was the one who cared for Mom and was Executor. This was their way of acknowledging what I did.
If the executor provides services in a professional capacity - is a lawyer, basically - then they'll charge a fee to the estate based on their usual rate. But a beneficiary (assuming you will be a beneficiary) acting as a private individual will get whatever the will says.
Is there any particular reason why you're wondering about this?
Just need to say that I guess a person can say in the Will that the Executor can get a larger amount then the law allows. My husband I have done two wills. One when our daughters were small and another when they were adults. I was with my Mom when she did hers. In all three instances and 3 different lawyers, not once were we asked if we wanted to give more to the Executor than the law allows. I did most of the work as Executor but had a lawyer to help with the sale of Moms house. He ended up doing the final accting of the estate and he charged for that. He did not get the %. I have heard of people allowing a lawyer do the complete probate and turning the % allowed over to the lawyer.
My dad verbally said I needed to be paid for doing my trust work for my parents' estate. He didn't state an amount, but the lawyer who was sitting right there absolutely agreed. Dad also wanted me to be paid for caring for him and my mom when I moved in with them for two months.
I was uncomfortable with that, but even after Dad died, the lawyer pushed the payment for caregiving part because he knew it was what Dad wanted. For me, it was an honor to care for them, but in the end, I ended up charging the estate and paying myself $30,000, which was something like $25/hour, the going rate for live-in caregivers at the time. Writing a huge check to yourself is a truly cringe-inducing experience.
Now that both of my folks are gone, I have not charged the estate for my work since the first year after Dad died in 2018, which was probably the most labor-intensive time. I paid myself here and there, but probaply only about $500. What I did do recently was charge the estate for gas, because since April I've been going back and forth to my folks' house getting it ready to sell. Since I live an hour away from the house and we're in Southern California where gas was $6 a gallon, you're darned tootin' I wasn't going to eat that expense.
I just distributed the lion's share of the estate to my brother and myself last week. It might have been nice if my brother had kicked back a little something for my efforts, but maybe he'll get me something nice for Christmas instead. He's a little tone deaf that way, but perhaps his girlfriend will nudge him to show his gratitude. He did thank me for my efforts many times, though.
I may have questioned that. If you used a lawyer, he may have taken the fee. You may not have been entitled to the fee, by law, if you didn't do the work, the lawyer did. My GF consulted with a lawyer when her Dad died. He said that if she allowed him to become Executor he would handle everything. He would get the fee.
I was my parents' trustee and oversaw their care for 12 years without any compensation. The estate was then split 50/50 between my brother and me. My parents never sent me a bill for all the care they gave me as a child! I would never dream of doing that to them! I find it sad and a little appalling that you're concerned with getting paid for helping your own parents. You don't get paid for being a good offspring!
Parents don’t have children in order to get care in their old age. That’s a false equivalency, the two just aren’t the same. I did the executor role, planned an entire funeral, met with an abominable funeral home staff, cleaned out an entire house, cleaned and sold the house, all without help from my siblings. And I didn’t get any more money for it. I don’t feel entitled but I also don’t find it particularly fair, as much of life isn’t
I'm amazed that so many of you say that executors are not allowed compensation, I think all Canadian provinces have legislation allowing for executors to be paid a percentage of the estate, although it is taxable income and many (most?) family members in that role choose to waive their rights to receive it.
Lakemama, the answer to your question is it depends on the laws in your state. You will hear advice/stories in this forum but they are nothing but anecdotes, because the different states do this differently.
In my state (Iowa), the executor is entitled to a fee of 2% of the estate value, unless the will states otherwise. It's my understanding that this 2% is taxable, which is one reason many executors might choose to decline it. My husband is currently the executor of his mother's estate (she died in February). It has been an enormous amount of work for us both. His parents had a very large property (five acres, a 100-year-old home and two huge outbuildings, both with two levels of storage). They were hoarders. Every possible place where "stuff" could be stored was full to the brim. The woman saved every single piece of paper that crossed her path, from grocery store receipts to junk mail to 60 years of cancelled checks. You don't want to know how many trips we made to Goodwill, how many dumpsters we filled, and how much stuff we hauled to the hazardous waste facility.
We had a little help from our niece and nephew, who will share in the estate with my husband (his brother, their father, died some years ago). Our own children helped a little as well. But the vast bulk of the work fell on our shoulders, and you can bet my husband will take the executor fee without the slightest bit of embarrassment. It's not a huge estate, but the niece and nephew will end up with a meaningful amount of money at a pretty young age, thanks mostly to the effort we've put in.
My own mother, knowing how hard we've been working on this, thought it would be cute to let me know she'd designated me as her executor, to serve WITHOUT compensation. I haven't decided whether or not to tell her this won't be happening. I don't care about the money - in all likelihood by the time she passes there won't be anything left after the bills are paid. It's the idea that she assigned all the work to me so that my brothers' share of any inheritance wouldn't be reduced. It just feels so disrespectful.
There are some on this forum who will say I'm greedy and unappreciative of everything our parents did for us. They're entitled to their opinion but I disagree. I visit my mother, I take her to medical appointments, my husband and I help her with repairs and maintenance of her house. He did all that with his mother as well. We take care of them while they are alive out of love; when they are gone and the state steps in with a million and one requirements to be met in a limited time frame, along with the fiduciary responsibility of that, I say executors deserve compensation.
That's kind of messed up, what your mom is doing...
I was the executrix of my mom's estate, which specified I was NOT to be compensated. But all of her assets were in trust, and they were all liquid/stocks, with no real estate property to be settled, so it was a very easy estate to settle. I think the hardest part of the job was getting the LifeAlert sent back. She passed in October, and I had the estate settled by the end of that year. So even if I was entitled to take a fee, I doubt I would have.
I think if there's a lot of work involved - like what you and your husband are doing with his mom's house, yikes!! - there should be a fee you can collect, because your time is worth something.
First, I'm very sorry for your loss of your husband.
I'm just a little confused by your question. Are you talking about settling your husband's estate or your parents? I would think if you're talking about your husband's estate, as his wife you would get everything, anyway, in addition to being the executrix.
So, I am going to assume you are talking about your parent's estate.
As others have said, whether you get a % of the estate as a fee depends on the laws of the state AND what the will/trust says. But if this is to try and recoup money for the time you have spent/are spending being your parents' sole caregiver, it would be better for you to arrange for payment NOW for caregiving services, rather than hope for money after they have passed, because by then their estate might very well have dwindled down to nothing, depending on the level of care they might need in the future.
I read your profile. You need more income. You'd stated you wanted your son to go to a private school. It looks like last year he went to the public school? Because of your parents' needs, you can't work outside the home.
What is your parents' financial situation? Can they afford AL? Could they become Medicaid-eligible? Sounds like your own retirement is tenuous.
Do you have siblings? What is their part in all of this? How did it come to be that your family was the one to move to CA to take care of your parents?
Reading these responses has been eye-opening! My father-in-law passed in 2017 and his widow is still living but my brother-in-law (who is a CPA) was his executor. It never occurred to us that he might not have been paid for all the time and money he has put into that duty but we intend to find out. If he hasn’t, we’re going to see that he is compensated from our share of any inheritance we might have in the future as I am sure he will also be my mother-in-law’s executor!
When an estate is Probated there has to be an accting that all beneficiaries have to sign before money is distributed. That accting should show the Executors fee if taken.
No they can get paid a reasonable fee for the amount of work they do. The fee is not estate size related! Many family members who are executors will not take a fee even though they are entitled. usually the fee is small a few hundred to a few thousand. Expect more if a lawyer gets involved.
The will should specify that the executor may charge a reasonable fee for his/her services. There is no specific definition of what a reasonable fee might be, and it would also depend upon the professional skills of the executor. It the executor is an attorney, a reasonable fee would be his/her normal billing rate. If the executor is some other sort of professional or just a good businessman, maybe the billing rate that a law firm would charge for the services of a paralegal or an accounting firm would charge for a staff accountant. If the right to charge a reasonable fee is not specified in the will you run the risk of other heirs deciding that your services are free.
The OP has not come back to tell us why they asked the question.
You are getting so many different answers here and probably because each of us reside in a different States. The best thing you can do is call your Probate Office and ask how the Executor gets a fee for the work they need to do.
All my Mom had was a house. I had made sure she was all caught up on her bills before Medicaid kicked in. All she had when she died was the PNA of $195 and a bank acct of maybe $200. All considered her estate. I had to get Probate started, it was up to me to do all the filings. Oversee the selling of the house, see that bills for the house were kept up, some coming out of my pocket and get a lawyer to do the house closing. He ended up finishing up Probate which was the accting. I had done all the tax stuff. I can't imagine what work I would have needed to do if my Moms estate was a large one. Executors so deserve that fee. And why should one sibling do all the work and not be compensated when the others have not done or ever did anything to help their parents. No I did not take a fee but I was compensated thanks to my brothers.
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
Hopefully they are paying their fair share of costs and giving you pay for your caregiving. If not, change that today.
https://law.justia.com/codes/georgia/2020/title-53/chapter-6/article-7/section-53-6-60/
I agree that pay as you go is better. There is no guarantee that there will be anything left in the estate or that you will outlive them.
I was the Executor of my parent's Will, never even thought about asking for a fee as I would be inheriting their estate.
Since your Mom has Alzheimer's/dementia she would be unable to change her Will. Your Dad can have his Will updated to mention a fee for being the Executor.
Often, the 'non executors' get angry b/c all they see is one kids getting 'more' than they are. But they don't see the behind the scenes work that goes into settling an estate.
My mother died on Sunday of this week. Her FPOA son immediately became executor and the look on his face when I said that to him was one of terror. Of course we are all helping, but he is doing the lion's share and after only 3 days, he is burned out. BUT, I did say to him, in the presence of the other sibs that he needs to keep track of his hours and charge the estate the going rate (which I think is now $30 per hour).
SO MANY little ticky tacky things to deal with. We are all helping but the final say goes right to him.
As much as YB would LOVE to be in control of this--he isn't the executor and his 'voice' has no more power than mine or my sisters'.
My Dh and I both did hundreds of hours of work for his dad's estate and my BIL kicked up such an enormous fuss over everything that we simply did not take a dime. Wasn't worth the family drama. I'm sorry to say I still struggle with the grasping relative who jumped in and took everything of value and demanded an accounting of everything--obviously not trusting my incredibly trustworthy husband.
At least we know what to expect when DH's mom passes. More of the same.
You don't HAVE to take the 'fee' but you are certainly entitled to it.
When I probated my Moms Estate I was asked if I would be taking my fee and I said no. It shows up in the final accting. The accting shows what each beneficiary will receive on the bottom line. This is where you contest the findings. My brothers turned over to me some shares worth about 5k that Mom had, the one reason why I didn't take the fee. I was the one who cared for Mom and was Executor. This was their way of acknowledging what I did.
Well handled to all of you, by the way.
If the executor provides services in a professional capacity - is a lawyer, basically - then they'll charge a fee to the estate based on their usual rate. But a beneficiary (assuming you will be a beneficiary) acting as a private individual will get whatever the will says.
Is there any particular reason why you're wondering about this?
I was uncomfortable with that, but even after Dad died, the lawyer pushed the payment for caregiving part because he knew it was what Dad wanted. For me, it was an honor to care for them, but in the end, I ended up charging the estate and paying myself $30,000, which was something like $25/hour, the going rate for live-in caregivers at the time. Writing a huge check to yourself is a truly cringe-inducing experience.
Now that both of my folks are gone, I have not charged the estate for my work since the first year after Dad died in 2018, which was probably the most labor-intensive time. I paid myself here and there, but probaply only about $500. What I did do recently was charge the estate for gas, because since April I've been going back and forth to my folks' house getting it ready to sell. Since I live an hour away from the house and we're in Southern California where gas was $6 a gallon, you're darned tootin' I wasn't going to eat that expense.
I just distributed the lion's share of the estate to my brother and myself last week. It might have been nice if my brother had kicked back a little something for my efforts, but maybe he'll get me something nice for Christmas instead. He's a little tone deaf that way, but perhaps his girlfriend will nudge him to show his gratitude. He did thank me for my efforts many times, though.
In my state (Iowa), the executor is entitled to a fee of 2% of the estate value, unless the will states otherwise. It's my understanding that this 2% is taxable, which is one reason many executors might choose to decline it. My husband is currently the executor of his mother's estate (she died in February). It has been an enormous amount of work for us both. His parents had a very large property (five acres, a 100-year-old home and two huge outbuildings, both with two levels of storage). They were hoarders. Every possible place where "stuff" could be stored was full to the brim. The woman saved every single piece of paper that crossed her path, from grocery store receipts to junk mail to 60 years of cancelled checks. You don't want to know how many trips we made to Goodwill, how many dumpsters we filled, and how much stuff we hauled to the hazardous waste facility.
We had a little help from our niece and nephew, who will share in the estate with my husband (his brother, their father, died some years ago). Our own children helped a little as well. But the vast bulk of the work fell on our shoulders, and you can bet my husband will take the executor fee without the slightest bit of embarrassment. It's not a huge estate, but the niece and nephew will end up with a meaningful amount of money at a pretty young age, thanks mostly to the effort we've put in.
My own mother, knowing how hard we've been working on this, thought it would be cute to let me know she'd designated me as her executor, to serve WITHOUT compensation. I haven't decided whether or not to tell her this won't be happening. I don't care about the money - in all likelihood by the time she passes there won't be anything left after the bills are paid. It's the idea that she assigned all the work to me so that my brothers' share of any inheritance wouldn't be reduced. It just feels so disrespectful.
There are some on this forum who will say I'm greedy and unappreciative of everything our parents did for us. They're entitled to their opinion but I disagree. I visit my mother, I take her to medical appointments, my husband and I help her with repairs and maintenance of her house. He did all that with his mother as well. We take care of them while they are alive out of love; when they are gone and the state steps in with a million and one requirements to be met in a limited time frame, along with the fiduciary responsibility of that, I say executors deserve compensation.
I was the executrix of my mom's estate, which specified I was NOT to be compensated. But all of her assets were in trust, and they were all liquid/stocks, with no real estate property to be settled, so it was a very easy estate to settle. I think the hardest part of the job was getting the LifeAlert sent back. She passed in October, and I had the estate settled by the end of that year. So even if I was entitled to take a fee, I doubt I would have.
I think if there's a lot of work involved - like what you and your husband are doing with his mom's house, yikes!! - there should be a fee you can collect, because your time is worth something.
I'm just a little confused by your question. Are you talking about settling your husband's estate or your parents? I would think if you're talking about your husband's estate, as his wife you would get everything, anyway, in addition to being the executrix.
So, I am going to assume you are talking about your parent's estate.
As others have said, whether you get a % of the estate as a fee depends on the laws of the state AND what the will/trust says. But if this is to try and recoup money for the time you have spent/are spending being your parents' sole caregiver, it would be better for you to arrange for payment NOW for caregiving services, rather than hope for money after they have passed, because by then their estate might very well have dwindled down to nothing, depending on the level of care they might need in the future.
What is your parents' financial situation? Can they afford AL? Could they become Medicaid-eligible? Sounds like your own retirement is tenuous.
Do you have siblings? What is their part in all of this? How did it come to be that your family was the one to move to CA to take care of your parents?
will not take a fee even though they are entitled. usually the fee is small a few hundred to a few thousand. Expect more if a lawyer gets involved.
You are getting so many different answers here and probably because each of us reside in a different States. The best thing you can do is call your Probate Office and ask how the Executor gets a fee for the work they need to do.
All my Mom had was a house. I had made sure she was all caught up on her bills before Medicaid kicked in. All she had when she died was the PNA of $195 and a bank acct of maybe $200. All considered her estate. I had to get Probate started, it was up to me to do all the filings. Oversee the selling of the house, see that bills for the house were kept up, some coming out of my pocket and get a lawyer to do the house closing. He ended up finishing up Probate which was the accting. I had done all the tax stuff. I can't imagine what work I would have needed to do if my Moms estate was a large one. Executors so deserve that fee. And why should one sibling do all the work and not be compensated when the others have not done or ever did anything to help their parents. No I did not take a fee but I was compensated thanks to my brothers.