My husband will only wash once or twice a week. He hurts near where his hip replacement is but they say it’s in place. He also has had two back surgeries and all apparatus is in place but he cannot have spinal injections because there is too much metal in his spine. The house smells awful. He also smokes, even though he smokes outside it waifs in with him and on his clothes. I’m sure others know of the cleaning the bathroom once or twice a day. Is there something special I can do to reduce the odor? I do the normal cleaning and clean where he sits when he washes. We really get no visitors besides my daughter and grandchildren. The few that have come by have not returned for another visit. I also notice when I come back home from running errands .
Is that something you'd consider? Also, has your husband's personal care routine been assessed with an Occupational Therapist? If discomfort is the real reason he won't wash more often (and not just an excuse), an OT might have some excellent answers.
ALL houses smell, by the way. Haven't you found that? That when you visit a friend or a family member after a long interval, the second you walk in you know where you are just through your nose? But there's personal, familiar smell; and then there's "doesn't grandpa like baths?" smell; and the latter I hope you'll be able to do something about.
He just won’t listen to me. I’m not a nagger, I never have been, maybe that’s my problem I’m not forceful enough. If I ask him to shower twice in a row, he considers that nagging!
If I disagree with him, he says I’m yelling at him...
things have changed and I just have to find a way to deal with it.
Second, air filters everywhere. In grandma's room, I have a dedicated air filter with charcoal. The charcoal is what's key. That's the only part that absorbs odors. In addition, the house HVAC has a big charcoal filter on it.
Third, showering once or twice a week is not bad. In fact, showering everyday is bad for you. Some perfectly fit people don't shower for weeks or months at a time. Really, our skin isn't designed for daily showers. It's bad for it. It kills the microbiome on your skin. That squeakly clean feeling after a hot sudsy shower is bad not good. If you have a healthy microbiome on your skin, you don't smell. That's the natural human condition, not smelling like soap.
https://www.businessinsider.com/how-often-should-you-shower-science-2017-1
Do all that and you house doesn't have to smell like a nursing home. Our house doesn't except when there's an active poop going on.
First of all he will not wear disposable underwear. When he showers and dresses he puts regular underwear on, his clothes and a jacket. He’s in these clothes until his next shower unless he decides to just wear a robe, no underwear with robe because the waistband hurts his hip.
As for washing everyday, that’s a matter of opinion as far as I’m concerned. We owned a supermarket for nearly 35 years, working 10+ hrs a day and we both showered every morning before work. It woke us up and it felt good, it was rare that we missed a day of work. His change in habits has only been since he was hospitalized for alcohol induced dementia. He also has sleep apnea and has lost his drivers license.
I don’t bag clothes, they go immediately into the wash, covers for his chairs also. I try to do everything possible that he will let me, even changing of clothes everyday won’t happen he won’t do it.
No ashtrays, he smokes outside. I’ve also started burning candles. I will try the Air Purifier next, thank you.
Maybe husband needs to take at least a sponge bath. Also, a change of clothes every day. Deodorant every day after a wash. Went my Mom tried to get out of a wash, I asked her if she wanted to stink, she said no and let me wash. I tended to be blunt to get my way.
Bowls of activated carbon(charcoal) would physically remove odors. The reactive surface will bind the odorous molecules eliminating them from the air. The downside to activated carbon is that it's not cheap. A cheap alternative is charcoal like what you would use on a grill. It's not as reactive as activated charcoal but can still be somewhat effective.
You can set a couple throughout the house and reduce foul odors by using oils that are specific for killing bacteria, bergamot or frankincense are great bases for odors and mix and match to find the fragrance that you like.
I use lemon, grapefruit and may ling with bergamot for a fresh clean smell and the diffuser runs for 6 to 8 hours. Lavender can help relax everyone, cinnamon can stimulate your brain. The options are truly endless and the results are very pleasing.
Have you tried a no rinse body wash for the stinky parts?
Unless he never puts pjs on and just stays in the same clothes for a week you could steal his clothes at night and set out clean ones.
Pet odor candles are really good for killing the smell of cigarettes. I used them for years and my house didn't smell like a dirty ashtray. I would burn them close to him to get him deodorized as much as possible.
Vinegar is a great bathroom deodorizer because it kills the enzymes that cause the odor. So spraying it around after cleaning neutralizes any residual odor.
I hope you find something that works for you, smelly house is difficult to live in. Hugs, such a difficult situation.
Would your hubby take a regular bath? I know it may be difficult for him to sit down in the tub and to try to get up.
Another thing you can try is to get hubby to use wet wipes like doing a bird bath. What I like are wipes called "Water Wipes".
Add fresh air to the house when possible. At night, we sleep with the windows opened a few inches. Nature's air fresher :)
white vinegar does wonders in the washer for odors on clothing. I have also used ionic air purifiers in the house.
As far as hygiene and not bathing they sell microwaveable bathing wipes for bathing. They work wonderfully along with a dry shampoo.
As far as smells in the house baking soda absorbs smells.Try putting small bowls of it around the house.Hope this helps.I have a similar issue with my 84yr old father.
If he can shower, get a shower chair, and make sure you install plenty of grabs for him to hold on to, along with a non-slip lining.
For the house, I like to use Citrus Cleaners. For your husband, you would first have to determine what is causing the odor. Sometimes it's from the diet - washing once or twice a week isn't really all that bad unless he's not being cleaned after going to the toilet. I used baby-wipes on my husband and I had no problems.
He was using a urinal the last couple of years and I found that a few drops of Hibiclens in his urinal took all the odor away without leaving any clinical smells. It actually cleaned his oldest (and his preferred) urinal!
You may need to start assisting him. HomeHealthCare will send someone in to help him bathe too.
Does your hubby smell like urine/ammonia? If so, please have his doctor check him out for kidney issues. Folks with kidney failure start excreting waste products of protein digestion into their skin. This makes their skin and breath smell terrible. It also makes the skin very itchy.
If kidneys are not a problem, see if your hubby will sit in a shower chair in the tub and allow you to shower him with a handheld shower. This worked well for my gram who disliked taking a bath. Metal implants can transmit cold better than bone. So metal implanted areas may feel more sore during winter. Try warming the bathroom with a space heater beforehand and warming clothes in the dryer beforehand too.
I would start by hiring a professional cleaning service to clean all of your upholstery. That will make maintaining your home a bit easier.
Use ammonia to deodorize all of his laundry. Wash his laundry separately. Let it soak in the machine for 15 minutes before washing. Dry his laundry on high heat or, weather permitting, on a clothes line in the sunshine. Other laundry additives you can try include pine soap and white vinegar plus baking soda.
If humidity is a problem, get a dehumidifier. Humidity only makes odors worse.
Even in the winter you can open all windows for 5-minutes in order to air out your home. I come from a mighty cold part of the USA and it's a routine that my mother did and that I continue to this day.
While it may be cold outside, open windows and put a fan in the window backwards. So it sucks air out of room and blows to outside. Wipe down every single thing in the room with disinfectant type cleaner (fabuloso makes some good smelling cleaners versus the old standard pine smells). Take the bedding to a laundromat and wash thoroughly - Original gain has a nice clean smell in soaps and dryer sheets. Change sheets everyday. Clothing in closets may have old smells as well - get rid of what's no longer worn and wash the rest. Go at it one room at a time and continue airing out that room daily as you work on other rooms.
Other smells can be years of nicotine or urine on the soft fabrics of the house - carpet, furniture, bedding, etc. Have steam cleaning company come in and do all the flooring and furniture. If he has some leakage, you might need to replace his favorite sitting chair. (Try to find another that is very similar to what he has now since his body has conformed to that particular style.) If you are tackling one room at a time, have the steam cleaner do the same - you clean and have them come. If there was ever smoking inside the house, you may need to paint walls and use first coat of a sealer type paint like Kilz.
For the outside smoking that gets sucked back in when you open door or gets on his clothing, put a fan outside that blows the smoke away from him and the door as he smokes.
After cleaning furniture, get a few of those rubber backed mattress pads and cut to fit his chair. You might leave the fitted corners at one end to give it a pocket to hang on to top of chair. Change those each day w/bedding. If he has leakage issues, try some pull up type underwear and if he is resistant to those, they make incontinence pads for women (might have some for men) that you could have him put inside his own underwear.
There are also Gain wax melts that can help - don't use them to cover up odors, use them in addition to the cleaning effort. (You can tell I'm a Gain promoter!! Love the smell).
Sams sells some very large adult wipes (and cheaper in price than anything else you'll find). Order online and you don't have to carry them from store to house. If he is not up to a bath one day (or does his bath in the mornings, have him wipe off every nook and cranny with the adult wipes before he goes to bed each night. I doubt he wants to be the smelly guy, but he probably no longer smells any of the things irritating you and others.
For urine and waste smell removal the recommendations were to wash floors and hard surfaces with baking soda, vinegar and orange essential oil.
Mattresses can be sprayed with vinegar. So vinegar should do the trick and it’s cheap!
I also like the oil candles, they work really well, but can be a fire hazard if knocked over.
Fortunately I was delivered from cigarettes 10 years ago. Now I can't even imagine how anyone can pay for them. Yikes!
It is important to add enough oil to work, you will find the best for your liking and needs. Start with 15 drops per cup of water and set the diffuser as high as possible to get the most square foot coverage.