Hi! My mom has day-time private caregivers (a few hours a day). My mom lives alone. I’m going to organize a private live-in caregiver. I interviewed several.
Do you have any experience with live-in caregivers? Did it work out? Did they behave well? Kind? No stealing? Was your LO happy with the caregiver? Thanks in advance, for all advice.
I had both of my folks living in Assisted Living which was less expensive than live in help 24/7, so that's the only first hand experience I have; they liked it quite well, too, but after dad died, mom eventually had to go into Memory Care AL in the same place and that she didn't love so much. Different ball of wax entirely.
I hope you find the perfect caregiver who's kind and honest, and one that your mom likes a lot. If you need someone 24/7, you'll likely need more than 1 person though, to split shifts, I would think. I'm sure you'll get lots of comments that are all over the map with different experiences, both good and bad. See if you can call references from prior clients for the gal you're considering; that would be your best bet.
Yes, my mom needs two live-in caregivers, to split shifts. I have several options right now; I already interviewed many people. It’s very hard to judge who’s a good person. I already have references, yes, but still…
We hired one to be with my parents for about 3 months when I had no choice but to go back to work. She had zero experience, was kind enough, but didn't cook anything they would eat. She cooked her own ethnic (spicy) food, offered it to them, and didn't give them anything else if they declined. I kept their freezer stocked with casseroles, though, and she would give them small servings of that and finish it off herself. She also would leave Dad in bed until 1pm saying he was sleeping. But she would just peek in the door and see he had his eyes closed - because he didn't have his glasses on! Anyways, it was a nightmare, but it was necessary at the time and with covid, she was all we could find. I shudder to think what it would have been like had I just trusted she'd care for them and left her to it!
Also, my mom was mean to her. She yelled at her for showering and *gasp* washing her hair!!! So she was patient in that regard.
This is a new post you may want to read if you haven't already,
https://www.agingcare.com/questions/my-dad-was-located-in-ca-and-had-caregivers-that-came-in-for-shifts-paid-a-flat-rate-for-a-24hr-peri-476881.htm
I ended up sending my daughter to daycare. One was hired for my father.
There were a number of iterations and a number stole. One had to be very careful.
1. Live-ins cannot own or rent another home.
2. Live-ins must work (be available) consecutive 24 hour shifts of no less than 5 days. In other words: Sun-Thu., Mon-Fri., etc. During their shifts the must be allowed a minimum hours of uninterrupted sleep (I believe it is 5), they must also have time off for meal breaks.
3. They must be paid at least the federal wage. Some states require rates above the federal rate. - But you can deduct rent. Additionally, live-ins are exempt from overtime pay, whereas standard, conventional employees/caregivers must be paid overtime after 40 hours.
I found that when all was considered finding conventional, 40-hour a week caregivers was the best way to go.
Another problem to consider is what happens if you get a live-in you don’t like and then the fed says you can’t kick out someone because of some new pandemic presidential executive order. I see a problematic situation with live-ins. More than one I’m willing to take a risk for.
PS. Whatever you do, conventional or live-in, RUN CRIMINAL BACKGROUND CHECKS. Find an independent agency for this. And do a 50-State search. I pay $117.00 every time I hire someone.
I don’t think we had any problems with stealing but I think one of the caregivers used moms address to qualify for a free cell phone. We received several letters/correspondence addressed to the same person regarding this free cell phone. I found a picture on Facebook and it looked very much like one of the attendants that came to the house. The agency swore it was not their employee but I’m not sure that was the truth.
We couldn’t have a live-in because moms house was in such poor condition there was not a suitable room for the caregiver to sleep in.
Something to consider with a live-in is how much attention/care your loved one requires. Who is going to relieve the live-in when they need rest or have to run errands or visit the doctor themselves, etc. How do you avoid caregiver burnout for the live-in? You need to be sure your loved one does not suffer because the caregiver is burned out.
We will have two live-ins. They’ll rotate shifts.