She keeps saying that after she sees her great grandchildren she is going to die. She also said that she asked God why is she still her and to please take her. She said he replied soon Pat soon. Does she know she is very adamant about it. She doesn't have dementia but does have heart and kidney problems and copd
Honor her beliefs and ask her any questions you need answered about funeral etc. it may upset you but she will take it in stride because she has been thinking about it already
One week before the event G GMA was hospitalized with pneumonia. No one called Sis or me, so we didn't know a thing!!! (Our family always "protects" the younger ones as far as bad news, waits to the last minute to tell them.) So when that week end came, both Sis and I decided since we'd just been there we'd wait, go again in a few weeks. We usually went every 4 to 6 weeks.
GMA slipped away that Sunday night, right about the time there would have been no hope that we were going to show up. At the funeral one of her caregivers said she couldn't believe GMA lasted more than a few days like that, yet alone the 6 or 7 days. Said it was almost like she was "waiting for something". For what ever it's worth, I do think she waited, and I do think she chose when to let go.
17 years ago my father passed away while having a massive heart attack (age 79). His back story is as follows: He sat in my living room and stated, 'I don't know what I'm still doing here. I'm ready to go home. I wish God would hurry up.' (or something on that line--after so many years the actual statement's a blur). My reply was instant, 'You got a good 6 months left in you.' We just looked at each other, stunned, but he nodded and said, 'I'm ready'. We left it at that. 6 months later he passed away but not without a fight in the ER. At one point he'd been stabilized and they let us go see him 1 at a time. Mom stayed with him a long time. She then came out and my cousin went to his side for 5 minutes and came out. Then he went into another round of attacks. The ER Team stabilized him again...mom went in a shorter time but then had to go to bathroom. I went in and was speaking to him..reminded him of our conversation 6 months prior, told him where my babies were(home in bed/sitter at house), and told him mom was out of the ER at the bathrooms and that we would be OK if he were to 'fly into the light'. Seconds later...he gurgled and the monitors blared again and the team came in for round 3. Mom wasn't even back from the bathroom yet and the team could not revive him. I believe that I had informed him of what he wanted to know...who was there, where they were, give him permission so that he could let go. He was gone before mom returned from the bathroom.
My mother is now 91, doesn't have dementia. She is terrified of the 'way' she will die, more so than dying. So she says. She's admitted to not being 'ready' yet. She is also the type of person that is super private and hold a lot of thoughts inward. When I even bring up the topic of 'being ready' or dying...she hushes me so much cause she is refusing to discuss it. Discussing it once with me was too much for her to handle. I suspect she has an innate feeling of knowing the exact 'way' she will go and it's terrifying her because she doesn't want that burden upon us kids; specifically me since I now live with her.
Bottom line is some do know, some state they are ready even though they are not near their 'time'. Others, are afraid to talk about it, admit things, and fear it so bad it emotionally torture's them into silence about it. Hugs.
She had gone into a "semicoma" like state staring on Monday. She was asleep a lot, ate very little,was aware but did not speak anymore. Wednesday night I laid down for a short nap and got up at midnight to sit by her bedside. At 5:19 Thursday morning she lifted up her hand towards Heaven, breathed a sigh, ever so gentle lowered her hand to her chest and went home.... I thank God that He allowed me to be there with her. It was a beautiful honor for me. I bathed her, changed her into her prettiest PJs, combed her hair one last time and called hospice to report her passing.
We each handle death in our own way. This was right for me....
Thank you for responding so kindly.
My grandmother-in-law said she couldn't die until I divorced her grandson. Well that didn't quite work out. She has since passed and we're still married. She had all her bearings also, just very old.
When her time comes, it comes, great grandchildren or not. Good luck!
Before her dementia got as bad as it is now, she told me that she had no idea she'd really live this long. She always thought she was on death's door and lived that way. She missed out on fun, friends, good times, enjoying what the world has to offer, and even creating any kind of bonds with me or other family.
Now it's too late and it would probably be a real mercy for her to pass, but she's still strong as an ox somehow. Jesus hasn't come yet today either.