When we moved to Florida, we bought a very large house because we had our family and mother was moving back in with us as well. Now we have had one of our children grow up and move out and mother has gone to long term care, so my husband and I have 1 child (who graduates and goes to military in 2 years) in a 5 bedroom, almost 4000 square ft house, We definitely need to downsize, but I feel guilty selling my mom's furniture (her home hospital bed, and recliner are really all there is..) She isn't going to be having any over night stays - they will not send her home with any meds, and she is on too many to miss. It's not wrong to do this, right?
Another option is to check your local communities to determine if they have "loan closets". Some in our area do, and lend out assistive devices to families who need but can't afford them.
Mom is in good hands. Do what you need to do to downsize and make some needed changes.
People couldn't believe we were "selling the family home" but now are envious as we have a smaller primary home.
Do it and enjoy the freedom and less expense.
And my advice to everyone I meet these days is - make sure you have your ducks in a row before you can no longer quack.
Best wishes to your family and specially to your son joining the military.