Hello Folks, my parents are in a medicaid program to keep them in their home as long as possible. The care plan offers assistance from aides throughout the day for quick meal prep. They get personal care help as well, even though my mother tells them no, insert eye roll here! My question is about the food. I was under the impression from the case manager that the aides would cook up eggs or make sandwiches, soups, etc. In reality, the meal prep is to warm up Meals on Wheels or frozen dinners. I would rather my parents not eat all that sodium and unfortunately, they hated meals on wheels. But I am noticing they hate everything and sometimes don't eat or just pick at the food. It's a lot of extra work I did not anticipate in terms of prepping 3 meals a day, 7 days a week, but now that I know, just wondering what advice you have for decent meals that the aides can quickly heat up in microwave. My pre-made egg muffins with bacon and onion were poison, per my father! Insert another, even larger eye roll here! They seem to hate everything that I make or buy for them. Just wondering what you have done to create a realistic meal plan that is easy for aides and healthy for parents. Not an easy situation working more than a full-time job that also requires a long commute and then cleaning up them and the home at the end of the day. I just can't seem to get a handle on what they can eat being so picky. I can certainly put warm up directions on the food so it is easy for aides and also palatable. Thank you, in advance!
You jumping thru fiery hoops to devise a meal plan they'll likely give two thumbs down to defeats the purpose. Nobody knows their tastes but them.
Good luck to you
What is the big deal about WARMING stuff? They can easily live on sandwiches, chips, and…well, sandwiches and chips. Cold salads. If they don’t like it, well, they get a little hungry, then I would bet they lower their fussy standards!
And, oh, for Pete’s sake, forget the “too much salt” nonsense. At their age/stage, imposing some “Live Forever!” diet is downright silly.
This is not helpful.
Perhaps do some writing / journal writing to get your anger out vs writing unhealthy comments here.
My parents like homemade soups for one meal a day. I made a big pot of vegetable beef, chicken noodle, chili, or potato soup each week along with a skillet of corn bread. Froze about half, served about half, and used previously frozen to add some varity.
Breakfast was usually some scrambled eggs and toast with different things added to the egg scramble - cheese, ham and cheese, bell peppers, peppers and onions. Made egg muffins by placing the "other" ingredients into muffin tins, pouring eggs, milk and bkack pepper mixture over it and baking @350 for 12-15 minutes.
Beef and cheddar wraps were popular: cut roast beef into smaller pieces and place on a tortilla wrap, cover with cheddar cheese, wrap it up and heat in the microwave just long enough to warm up. Meatloaf was a hit as my Dad had some chewing/swallowing issues. Chicken and dumpings and a chicken & dressing casserole were well liked too. Baked potatoes, mashed potatoes, brocolli, green beans, salad made with either lettuce or cabbage (cabbage lasts longer in fridge) and other side dishes that heat well in the microwave and/or freeze well. Fruit for snacks: apples, bananas, grapes, watermelon and cantaloupe cut and stored in single servings so they can just take one out of the fridge.
Once I got started I found I could do most of the cooking/prepping once a week and just use the microwave to heat stuff up though the week. I also purchased a meal from fast food once a week; Mom loved a cheeseburger with onion rings and a strawberry milkshake while Dad loved fried fish and a baked potato. A little time planning around the food choices they have liked and you can make it work.
Also you could tell your overentitled parents that this is what is being served, and if they don't eat it, they starve. That might be what they told you when you were a kid. Right back atcha, mom and dad.
When I needed a quick meal for my Husband I would thaw out a frozen jar of whatever. (Zip top bags work great for this as well.)
If I was out for the day and needed a caregiver to heat up lunch for him I would take a jar out the day before and it would be ready for the microwave the next day for lunch.
I also would make him a pretty hearty breakfast so that if he slept through the day I did not worry if he did not eat a lunch. Because he slept a lot as he declined his main meal was a breakfast. I honestly did not worry if he did not eat much at lunch or dinner.
So if you are making meals for your family make a double batch, portion and freeze for you folks. And when you freeze a portion make it a bit less than what you think they "should" eat. Chances are they don't need the larger portion that you think they should eat.
And don't worry if they pick at their meal. If their doctor is not concerned about a potential weight loss it probably means you don't have to worry either.
I get eye rolls all the time from my 93 yr. old mother and I say "Did you just roll your eyes at me?!" She always denies it. Role reversal.
I do not worry so much anymore about sodium, sugar, trans fats. She gets low sodium chicken broth at night when I come home from work. I have other snacks prepared or store-bought for her on a small plate that she doesn't have to heat up and luckily, she like to make herself cereal (Raisin Bran). She is a fairly good eater, not picky and does not eat a lot. So if I pick up something to-go from a restaurant, it's big enough to share. I do this when I just don't have the time or energy to cook. It may cost a little more but I cherish the ease of it and no dishes to wash (don't have a dishwasher). Have any friends who like to cook that could be recruited to help prep you meals for them? Parent(s) with dementia will rarely praise you or show appreciation for all that you do for them. At least that is my experience. Pat yourself a lot on the back for what you CAN do for them and try to get with a support group of caretakers in your area whether it's offered virtually or in person. Thank God this forum is here so we can laugh, cry, vent and offer ideas and solutions. Right now I could use a personal assistant but just cannot afford one. Maybe your parents could write down 5 of their favorite meals/ snacks and you could create a simple, fixed menu from there. Good luck, but ultimately, they will eat if they are hungry; even after the complaining.
See All Answers