It seems that other sibilings in the family feel that their lives are too busy or they have exceptional circumstances to be involved with any part of mums care, even though she has just moved in to a nursing home, so the load is now lighter. Some have the attitude of someone else can do it. My husband is worried that his sister will burn out without some support, as we have done - there is 7 in the family. We are very willing to take some of the load but cannot take it on again fulltime as it seems we are expected to do. We feel that it would be nice if others in the family would be willing also to make it easier for everyone & give their mum quality of life. Is this a common problem? Does it always fall to only one?
Occasionally if there is enough goodwill to go around, a schedule of visits or tasks may be set up by a family that can talk things out and agree on it. Sometimes those who live far away can be persuaded to help financially at least. Don't try to do what you know you cannot do, but if you do whatever you realistically can to help, it wil be a blessing to at least you, mom, and sister regardless of what the others choose to do.
I don't get it though? Why did we not turn our backs? What is the difference between us and our siblings? I don't understand. I'm just a normal -- (of course on those bad days that is even up for debate) every day person. Some of you said...you can't make them help...I agree. I've asked...a few different ways...and I'm done. It is too hard on me being angry with them. It sometimes still creeps up but I quickly put it in it's place. They have come through a couple times during an emergency. I'm grateful for that.
God definitely knew the folks that would be best for the job...if you wonder who. Go look in the mirror. God Bless all of you.
God bless you
Best of luck. We all know it's hard. It just is.
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