She will just give it to her daughter who offers no help of any kind. She is a financial burden to her son and myself and I am beginning to resent all that I do for her because she gets ugly about contributing. Between extreme spending and giving to her daughter and and grandson she ran through every cent her parents left her plus mortgaged the free and clear home they left her. THe daughter helps with NOTHING. My husband and I can not even have an evening out to dinner alone! After being diagnosed with dementia six months ago and being totally broke except for her ssi her son moved her in with us. It is a financial strain on us and I feel she should be contributing. Where can you live for free?
If you and your husband are planning to provide her with a home and care in the long-term, you must make provision NOW, before she loses capacity, to take responsibility for her income and outgoings (through a POA, if possible) - otherwise there will be a world of trouble and stress ahead.
How is your brother's relationship with his sister? If she is unthinking, rather than intentionally exploitative, perhaps he can get her to concentrate on their mother's welfare and co-operate: it would make setting up POA much easier.
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