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Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
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I could close Mom's accounts, but she likes to wirte a check for hairdresser, etc, and feel a little control, so I have not done that. Would like to advise my sister of Elder abuse, if this situation qualifies.
This is a hard one. Is it possible to open a second account for your mother (that your sister doesn't have access to) and put most of your mother's funds in there? You could keep just enough in her "public account" for her to pay the hairdresser and other monthly luxuries. It would mean adding funds to the "public account" every month or as needed. This would mean more work for you. Are you up for it? Unfortunately, unless the amount is more than $2,000 a month, it probably doesn't qualify as elder abuse. But you might contact your state's elder abuse omnibudsman anyway. Just the inquiry might cause your sister to stop and think. Good luck.
Some months it is over $2,000, but not consistently. As Mom's expenses increase it will make it difficult to meet 'both' households. My concern about letting Mom have a separate account is insufficient funds checks - Sis can talk her out of anything. I'll give it more thought and contact Missouri Elder Abuse Omnibudsman...not sure how to do that, but will try.
How competent is your mother to understand the decisions she is making? Unless she is not legally competent I guess she can give her money to anyone she wants to.
But the fact that you are exercising POA indicates she is a vulnerable adult. Shame on your sister for taking advantage of her!
I think two accounts make sense. That's how I let my husband (dementia) have a checkbook to pay for haircuts and incidentals without putting our household account at risk. Yes, with your sister involved that may mean more work for you, perhaps checking that account online daily, and it may mean some overdraft charges, but in the long run it might be worth it.
Vickie, what if mom ONLY used a credit card? That way sister wouldn't be able to sponge any money, and mom would still be able to spend (without going crazy) hopefully.
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
Unfortunately, unless the amount is more than $2,000 a month, it probably doesn't qualify as elder abuse. But you might contact your state's elder abuse omnibudsman anyway. Just the inquiry might cause your sister to stop and think.
Good luck.
But the fact that you are exercising POA indicates she is a vulnerable adult. Shame on your sister for taking advantage of her!
I think two accounts make sense. That's how I let my husband (dementia) have a checkbook to pay for haircuts and incidentals without putting our household account at risk. Yes, with your sister involved that may mean more work for you, perhaps checking that account online daily, and it may mean some overdraft charges, but in the long run it might be worth it.
Good luck!