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By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
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V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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Mostly Independent
Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
Remember, this assessment is not a substitute for professional advice.
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When she does get up she is very unsteady, walks hunched over and shuffles. Lately, when we wake her she is completely "zoned" out and does not respond, can't stand, etc. doesn't know we're there. Is this normal for alzheimers?
No this isn’t normal. I’m not a medical person, but I’ve ushered many elders through these medication nightmares. Your mother is being turned into what I call, a Zombie. This may only be because the doctor isn’t aware of what is going on. Occasionally, you’ll see this in a nursing home, because the old fashioned view was to keep the residents “manageable” with anti-psychotics and other drugs. There is a place for anti-psychotics for some people with Alzheimer’s, but when they affect people in this way, the doctor needs to make dramatic adjustments. Please get the doctor’s attention and tell him or her what is going on. Journaling helps. Tell the doctor everything you’ve said here and insist on changes. If you don’t get cooperation, change doctors. In my view, this is unacceptable, unless there is a valid medical explanation. I’d at least get a second opinion. Good luck, Carol
I agree with Carol but also mention that for many demented folks, sleep is really the only respite they can get from their own living nightmare! 22 hours of sleep per day is certainly excessive but there may be many factors contributing to this pattern in addition to severe over medication. If some of these possibilities (depression, thyroid, severe hypotension . . . ) were addressed the need for anti-psychotic medications may be mitigated or even eliminated all together.
A little background here. My mother-in-law's medications didn't seem to be working and she went on and on from morning to night screaming, trying to hit, bite, etc., even hiding a hammer under her bed and trying to hit my sister-in-law with it. The Dr. tried all sorts of combinations, upping her anti-depressants, risperidol, etc. It's a dilemma, as you can imagine. If she can't get calmed down, we have to consider a nursing home, and no-one wants that at this point. But we don't want her so doped up she sleeps all the time either. Also, about every 4th day or so - she gets a burst of energy and paces, screaming, accusing and threatening - as she did just this evening. I should also mention she has always been a very difficult person and mentally abusive - so it was a process trying to come to terms with "this is Alzheimers", and not just her usual behavior. But we have gotten there and it's a better place to be for us. Thank you Carol and Cindy - we have started documenting and will discuss with her Dr. very soon.
As a social worker for a non medical home care agency and I specialize in dementia care, placement is the last thing I advocate for in most cases, but in your case it sounds like the best solution for all of you. From the details available it seems as if your mom needs the structure, routine and supervision of a specialty care environment. We never want to place our loved ones but often that is the most unselfish and loving decision for their sake as well as yours. From professional and personal experience with a grandparent, I have seen placement make a huge improvement in the lives of a dementia patient. It sounds as if there may be some underlying mental health issues contributing to her mood and behavior as well. Please don't see placement as a failure on your part to care for your mom. Special medical problems need special care. If she had broken her hip, you would send her to rehab right? Obviously you care deeply for your mom, please consider looking at dementia care facilities in your community, if for no other reason you may need this option in a crisis situation and will have already done your homework. Good luck and God bless.
Thank you so much Cindy. I wills share these e-mails with my husband. Hopefully, he can persuade his brother to consider this. After 2 1/2 -3 years of living full time with us she went to live with her other son and family about 2 years ago (we couldn't do it any more). She has been with us for the last month so my sister-in-law could have a much needed break. I will let you know the outcome. I so appreciate your concern.
I had a friend who's alzheimer's Mom was the same, screaming, yelling, hitting, awake ALL the time. She went on 250 depakote 4 times a day, calmed her right down and she lived with her another year or so until she passed away. Best of luck to you.
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
There is a place for anti-psychotics for some people with Alzheimer’s, but when they affect people in this way, the doctor needs to make dramatic adjustments. Please get the doctor’s attention and tell him or her what is going on. Journaling helps. Tell the doctor everything you’ve said here and insist on changes. If you don’t get cooperation, change doctors. In my view, this is unacceptable, unless there is a valid medical explanation. I’d at least get a second opinion.
Good luck,
Carol