I've lived near my grandparents ever since leaving college and try my hardest to be available when they are in need as well as spend time with them. This has increased over the years and they are at a point that if I'm not around they would have difficulties. I'm wanting to establish them with an in-home care service so I'm able to find work in a different state. It's very difficult to get my parents and uncles to be on the same page or take initiative. It feels like my family is most concerned with maintaining their relationships while it seems I'm more concerned with their health and safety. At this point, I find myself spending more time with them than accomplishing my goals and I'm worried this will make me resent my family. I've spoken to them about helping with this and conversations have been had but those are easily forgotten and the brunt of the situation is on me.
People don't tend to do anything until is plopped down in front of them. You love ur grands but its their childrens responsibility to make sure they are safe and cared for. They don't have to do the caring just need to make sure their parents have someone doing the care.
You already resent this situation, or you would not have posted. Don’t wait for it to get worse. There are so many posts from people who find it hard to believe that others can’t see past their own best interests, so they let themselves be taken advantage of for years. Your parents and uncles are perfectly capable of coping if they have to.
Please tell others in your family that you must take the time needed to build for your own future. Are they caring for your grandparents at all? Have they ever assumed responsibility? Are there health issues with your grandparents?
I feel they have taken advantage of you because you live near your grandparents but that isn’t a reason to dump it all on you. You are to be praised for being loving and generous with your time but that isn’t fair to you. Explain this to your family, including your grandparents so they will know that you are not abandoning them. It sounds like you love them and I am sure they love you. They can’t help it if they need help as they are aging. You are right to want to see them set up with proper care.
Take care. Best of luck to you.