First time posting, need some general advice. Good intentions turning into scary commitment.

Checks are easy to order by calling the bank and this cannot be the first time she has had to order checks in her life. The fact that she is clueless about how to do this now, and that she hasn't DONE it as checks ran low is your big clue to the fact that she is not in a good place, especially down that dirt road, and no mail, and it is going to get worse. I think the neighbors who WERE helping have left a clear message that they are done. That story doesn't make sense on the face of it, so perhaps lost in translations. Neighbors don't act in your behalf for some time, then dump you 10 miles away at a store.
So basically I am saying you are getting pulled into a swamp that you are not going to survive in, and tough-love talk, you need to stop it now. It will not get better. In fact it will get a good deal worse.
Your neighbor is now reportable to Adult Protective, not because she is abused but because she is helpless, without transit, down a dirt road with no family. She needs now the resources of the County and perhaps even guardianship of the county.
Thank goodness for Send Help, but I would add caution that you not get yourself involved in this, but begin to wind OUT of helping. This lovely lady needs some placement in housing from which she can negotiation the world, Covid or NO covid.
I hope you will keep us updated, because now as you try to get her connected to help you will be able to tell us what you are finding out, who will help, and how it goes.
You have BEAUTIFUL heart and soul.

Call 211 from her house. Have her answer their questions.
Ask for resources for seniors during Covid. Shopping help.

Checks can be ordered by phoning the bank, having them sent to the address on file, the home address.

You should not be advancing the money for groceries at all, comes the day the checks run out, or a check bounces. And there your name is, on her financial records, what was all that money she was paying you for, do you have receipts, an accounting? See?

Have her phone the mailbox company to mail her another key to her home. Maybe the mailbox company can Fed-ex or UPS her mail to her finca.

Your employer is liable for what you are doing grocery-wise for her, and would not be happy to hear how you are "helping" (getting involved financially) with a customer at their store. Fired?

Follow your parent's advice before this becomes one hot mess, for you. So sorry life is that way now. You can fulfill your good samaritan role by getting the help she needs, instead of doing it yourself. The good deeds you have done will come back as false accusations to you. Have you not heard? No good deed goes unpunished?

Now that this sweet little old lady has you trained to be advancing money for her, how do you know that it is not you who is vulnerable?

Of course you can talk to your parents about this. If you are doing this now secretly, behind their backs, and behind your employer's back, well then, you are not going to heed my warnings either, are you?

So this was meant to highlight the downside. There must be a silver lining somewhere...................................................................................................................................................
Thank you for taking her home. Once. Your role is finished now, imo. Harsh, huh?

Elder Resources in Miami Dade County
Miami, Coral Gables, South Miami, Kendall, Miami Beach, Miami Springs, Miami Lakes, North Miami, North Miami Beach, Aventura

 Area Agency for Aging
305.670.6500
They will CHAT with you online!

Designated by the State of Florida, the Miami Alliance for Aging serves as the official local Area Agency on Aging (AAA) for Miami-Dade County. The Alliance for Aging provides access to local quality services for the full spectrum of elder needs in Miami-Dade and Monroe counties. This agency provides funds and oversees for home and community based services - that try to keep people out of nursing homes. For example the AAA helps fund services that provide meal delivery, transportation, adult-day care centers and respite services for caregivers.
For low-cost door-to-door transportation in Miami-Dade (STS) and Broward (TOPS), for those that meet ADA requirements, click the link.

You are a tremendously kind hearted person. That's the first thing I want to say!

Try giving your local meals on wheels organization a call, and
1) maybe arrange for food to be delivered and
2) I'm betting, especially in Florida, this is not the first time they've seen this situation. Since they go out to people's homes they are probably a wealth of information about local resources this woman could receive.

Rob, I've read all the answers and see you have received much good advice. I want to go in a bit of a different direction with my answer.

Obviously, you were sensitive to this elderly woman's need and you have great desire to help her and to do so in a wise way. I suggest that you should look at the bigger picture and consider whether you might want to pursue your education toward a career in social service, specifically for seniors.

You’ve gotten good advice below. This sweet lady will need more help going forward than you can provide. I’m just chiming in to say how wonderful it is that you’ve cared enough to step in, speaks very highly of your character. You’ve been a blessing Rob

Rob, I also want to compliment you on your concern, generosity and willingness to help this woman.    When my parents and sister needed help, those who stepped up to provide it were cherished, and remembered.    Those who didn't help but asked for items after the individual deaths will also be remembered, for their greed.

In these challenging times, it's heartwarming to read of someone who reaches out to help someone in need.

As others have pointed out, you've done enough. It's so nice that you did what you did when so many would not. Have you asked why the neighbors left her at the store? Issues you may not be aware about?

You say she lives on a farm. Who is taking care the upkeep, cutting the grass, etc?
If you keep going, she could convince you to take care of these needs as well. (You're already grocery shopping for her, so it is starting).

She may be lonely as well, and would welcome your company to do more tasks for her as well.
Time to contact those who know how to handle these situations to get involved.

Your Parents are right. Time to call in people who can help her. You sound young, so I would not even consider POA. There is a lot of responsibility as POA. Social Services or Adult Protection services will try to find any family members she has. They will make sure she has what is needed. DO NOT use your own money unless an emergency. You can help her call the Post office for a new key, if they own the box, Banks still have people working. My bank has the option of ordering checks on line. Hopefully you kept the receipts or copies showing you bought food and she reimbursed. Do not allow this woman to continue to lean on you. If she is alone, you may have done her a favor. The APS may be able to find her a safer place to live.

As others have said, you've been very kind. It's always nice to read heartwarming stories about people helping others. However, this is becoming more than just a ride now and then to help this woman out.

As others noted, checks can be ordered by phone. If she explains to the bank the issue with the mail box, they might be able to have them shipped to her home. However, given that she cannot collect her mail, how will she get and pay her bills, even if the check issue is resolved?

For the mail box, if the PO owns that, it might be like the ones that they had at the condo complex our mother was living at. There was a group for the condos in each area. They are similar to PO boxes in the PO, but standalone. The person delivering can open the back side and put everyone's mail in, then each person has a key to access their mail box. When mom couldn't find her key, I contacted the PO about it. They don't have spare keys for those and it would require replacing the whole mechanism for her, with a new set of keys. This was going to cost her! Fortunately she did find the second key and we avoided the replacement. So, she could contact the PO and request either a key, if they can do that, or have it replaced and get new keys. She would likely either have to go to pick up the new key(s), which you could facilitate, or perhaps they might be nice and deliver the keys. She still would need to get to the box to pick up her mail after that. Can she walk that far and back?

As for the groceries - the concern others had could be valid. If there are distant relatives, they could accuse you of bilking her. If she needed Medicaid at any point, unless she is saving the receipts, they would consider this "gifting" and could deny her benefits. Even social services, if they get involved, could give you the stink eye. It would only be your word to protect you and that might not get you far.

While you could help her by suggesting the possible check and mail box solutions, there is still the issue of you having to buy and get reimbursed by check. The last thing you need is to be accused of elder abuse just for trying to be kind! Also, as others noted, if she has difficulty doing things, who is caring for her place? There's always regular maintenance and then there are emergencies to take care of. It might be best to talk with her and suggest she call social services to see what options they might have for her. She may not need much yet, but as she gets older, it can't hurt to have someone watching out for her. Some aide companies allow their employees to go to the store for the clients. Very few will drive them there and back, probably due to liability, but they do exist. However she is reluctant to go because of the virus, so if she can hire some company to do her shopping, she could pay them by check. I know it sounds like the same thing you are doing, but they would be able to back up their services, where you likely can't.

If she can manage to get the checks and mailbox issues dealt with, perhaps you could suggest she order her foods, either online if she has access, or by phone, and have them delivered. She could make payment by check to the store, handed off to the delivery person when the food and supplies arrive.

Even if this doesn't work out, do keep that handy helpful spirit! Just beware and don't let people take advantage of your kindness (if they keep pulling you in to do more and more, they are abusing your kind spirit!) Hope things work out well for your "adopted" grandma!

I live near Tampa, Florida. I volunteer at a Christian women's resource center for women like your friend and women in other at-risk situations. In Hillsborough County, we have a couple of police officers assigned to help the at-risk population. I am fairly certain that Miami-Dade County has a similar program. Please call the police on their non-emergency phone number about your foster abuela. They should be able to connect her with all the resources available in her area. Also contact local churches since they also know the available resources in her area. Thank you for caring for her needs during a time when she greatly needs the help. It appears she may need a different living situation.