I have a certain comfort being in the house I grew up in, but since my parents have passed very suddenly in the pandemic (4 months apart from each other), sometimes the memories can be too much. It's been 3 years since they passed. I think I'm driving my husband nuts because I'll get depressed (even though I feel I'm WAY better than I was). Still haven't gone thru all their things either. Any advice is appreciated. Do I stay in the house (which I love) and just fight thru it? Move?
My suggestion would be that it’s worth trying how to cope, as you have always liked the house, but you need to stop the memories being just about the depressing past.
Be kind to yourself, give yourself time. I found going through my mother's belongings triggered memories and grief, but it was easier to do it in spurts. I wasn't super efficient, but I gave myself space to "feel and deal". It was tough to get rid of somethings (sometimes things you would think should just be tossed) so I handled them several times before final determination to toss or give away etc. I sorted into boxes or bags ...toss now and review again later. All of this was part of being gentle with myself and the memories as I processed everything (feelings etc).
I also slowly replaced some of the furniture.
Eventually, my grief morphed and the memories became comforting and sweet.
Blessings
Please seek help now. The house is not the problem here. You can stay in the place you love, and you can have beautiful memories that sustain you with the proper help. My heart goes out to you in your pain. But you are responsible now to yourself and your family to deal with this prolonged grieving.
Then treat the house as if you had just moved in and now want to make it yours. Renovate, paint, freshen, change it up to reflect you.
I know it's hard to let go. I've cleaned out 3 houses. The most difficult was my twin brother's home. But I forced myself to donate his belongings that were in good shape and resist setting up a shrine. It took awhile - mainly in 2-3 hour increments because at first it was so devastating to go over there, but eventually it got easier.
Life is for the living.