My dad has dementia, & is in a home. My brother has been his caregiver as he has always lived at home (while I now reside in England - they are in Toronto). My brother won't update me - and gets very defensive when I ask for updates. I am being shut out. I would like to know what to do. Thanks in advance for any help!
Are you calling dad? Sending him cute greeting cards every few weeks? Sending your brother a gift card now and then to thank him for doing the heavy lifting? Sending a big box of candy to the nursing home on behalf of dad's family on Nurse's Day or Christmas or 'just because'? Do you fly in to see him every other year or so?
I'm asking just to come at this issue from another perspective. There must be some reason you're not sharing that causes your brother to be defensive...