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Who are you caring for?
Which best describes their mobility?
How well are they maintaining their hygiene?
How are they managing their medications?
Does their living environment pose any safety concerns?
Fall risks, spoiled food, or other threats to wellbeing
Are they experiencing any memory loss?
Which best describes your loved one's social life?
Acknowledgment of Disclosures and Authorization
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment. You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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Mostly Independent
Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
Remember, this assessment is not a substitute for professional advice.
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This man is 92, has been a minister and his private parts are private, needs assistance with showers because of incontinence but gets very upset when any assistance is needed. How do we get him to take a shower without a fight?
Dang, you & sis have it easy....lol...(j/k....NOTHING is very easy with being a caregiver). My boss is not modest at all! But, she used to resist the shower s too. She just didnt feel like taking a shower, and she would start to smell. Especially down in the lower regions. Also, we would worry about UTI because of the hygiene issues. I think the best approach that works for my lady is to take a minute before having to assist with ANYTHING that takes a little bit of their dignity away, and maybe tell him that you understand it's an uncomfortable situation, and that you understand it must be very hard for them to have to accept this kind of help. That you realize a certain amount of their dignity, and independence is being taken away but, it's something that is very important for them to be able remain healthy. Or maybe have a male family assist with this task as often as possible. Try not to make him feel like he is a spectacle. Have only one female help him all the time. I usually try to imagine if it were me in the same position. How would I feel? What would make me feel more comfortable. Helping our elderly maintain as much dignity, and independence as possible is so important to their mental happiness. Good luck.
Thank you for your answer. The person I shower is my husband who is 87. I don't know that he is modest as he never was before. He just doesn't like me putting soap on him. I explain he needs to be kept clean and because he has a cathetor and I am only trying to help. I joke around with him while I shower him and try and get him to laugh and forget I am soaping him up. I used to get in the shower with him but now he won't stand long enough so he has to sit in the shower chair. Once he is out and dry he is ok and says the shower felt good. I am his wife and full-time caregiver. I used to have someone come and bath him but it wasn't any better for them. I just feel like a monster each time I have to do the shower thing and find it very exhausting.
Do you have male caregiver that can assist him? My mom has Alzheimer's and we have her sit in a shower chair and hand her the shampoo, tell her to rinse, then hand her the conditioner, tell her to rinse,etc. She does not want us (sis and me) to see her unclothed so we hand things thru the shower curtain, when she is done washing and rinsing then we leave the bathroom so she can dry and dress herself.
What about once you get them into the shower and sit them on the shower chair, they just look at you and tell you they want to get out. They yell and fight to get out. Once I get the soap on him by using a spongie and then shampooing his hair, I warm the water (I have a hand held) and hold the water over him. He yells for a little bit and then finally settles down. Still can't wait to get out so I have to move quickly. He won't help wash himself so I am soaked usually by the time I am done and get the towel around him. He always loved his daily shower but no longer. I shower him every 2-3 days but always a hassle. Any suggestions? I do talk calm and short sentences but nothing helps.
Cali~I agree with mom it is easy right now, but as the dementia increases, she may get where she is afraid of the water. Now it is just that she forgets to bathe plus she does not have bathtub which she always had and used before. You are so right about preserving their dignity and independence.
clean is clean, no matter how you get there. Washcloth a bit at a time if necessary -- hard to get hair clean though. Ever done foot soak for them -- feels nice, less traumatic than a shower? Water not too hot in a flat plastic tub while in the kitchen (them seated). Towel under the tub to keep bottom from being cold. He loved the attention, and feet got clean (hard to do in a shower).
Rather than using soap products use Cetyphyl (not sure of spelling) or some other type of NON soap pump dispenser that way if it all does not get rinsed off it is OK, no additives to cause irritation. Don't think this would do well on hair but Burts Bees makes a baby shampoo that is in a pump dispenser and very gentle & will not burn eyes.
what about the liquid soaps? They aren't cold, smell nice & there are gentle formulas (Dove) for dry skin. Bed baths are also an idea when it's mainly the peri area/armpits that smell. Just put down an extra towel & roll over when finished. I distinctly remember "pm care" in the long term care facility where I worked & we would premedicate to calm some agitated people....the nurses aids get beat up during this time......good luck & keep praying!
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.