My mom has Alzhiemers and many other health issues. She had a stroke last week and my Dad removed her from hospital, AMA. 1 day later, she was back in hospital. 5 days later she was moved to a nursing/rehab center. 48 hrs later, he brought her home, without speaking to her doctor. He physically cannot tend to her needs. He refuses hospice or in home care. He is making poor, uninformed decisions regarding her medical care. What steps do I need to follow to make sure my Mom is taken care of?
If mom's safety is at risk and she's suffering, you can also contact Adult Protective Services and they will conduct an investigation.
It sounds like he's refusing all help. I'd treat it as an emergency.
Before you judge your father too harshly (I've been there with my parents) - it is very possible your father is doing what your mother is requesting. I can tell you first hand, my dad tried to do what my mother wanted - even when it was not a good decision. He had his own health issues and I don't think he ever realized how poorly my mother was doing. But knowing my mother, I know my dad was just following her orders. It's a tricky situation.
You will definitely need to seek legal aid. It is hard to prove someone needs POA.
Your dad shows some signs especially where he is taking a lot of effort to 'put everything in the right place' as far as he's concerned & that is your mom home with him taking care of her - he may also be in beginning of dementia which could be going unnoticed as everyone focuses on mom
I also found 'HOW TO TALK TO A DEMENTIA PATIENT' extremely helpful so that your body language doesn't make their hackles raise before you even start speaking - I recommend it all here - if nothing else you'll know more to help your mom - good luck