My MIL (alzheimers) has been very stubborn her whole life. I find myself spending way too much time .....cajoling...........requesting...........ultimately begging her to cooperate. And that is exhausting.
For the moment, my biggest obstacle is getting her to go to bed at night. I am exhausted and need a little bit of time to myself. That is a boundary I need to set. but she refuses to budge. She says "go ahead and go to bed. I'm not going and you can't make me." She refuses to budge. The longer the evening progresses, the more confused and stubborn she becomes. I've tried getting her up early etc.
But she is stubborn about getting up too.......... and simply refuses and just lays there all morning wide awake. She never naps.
I've given her Tylenol PM, warm milk etc with no success.
Any of you have this problem?
We tried melatonin at the doctor's request. Didnt do much.
After alot of research, we realized we needed to take the shades off the window. This causes lots of sun to come in, and sleeping with sunshine gets difficult over time.
Receiving sunshine early everyday "resets" the inner clock. There needs to be daily regular sunshine, and exercise if possible.
Otherwise we have tried everything, and nothing works.
The only thing that caused a measurable difference and finally worked was first forcing sunshine (I am willing to bet that your MIL is also vitamin D deficient), making it a ritual for her to walk to get the things she wants so that she is on her feet more, and making everything a ritual and saying things out loud (it psychologically sets you up for a physical-schedule) every night I announce "time for dinner" and "time to clean up after dinner" and " can I get you water?" and by repeating the same sentences every day at the same time, it programs your body for what comes next. Sun and vitamin D do the rest.
It takes time, it works on everybody regardless of age or gender, requires consistency, and provides a sense of security.
Hope it helps.
My husband is up and down all night, but he's safe to leave alone. I sleep in another room, so my sleep isn't disturbed by his coming and going. I'll have a problem if he ever becomes unsafe to be up by himself :-(
I feel sorry for whoever will be my caregiver if I get ever dementia. I've been a night owl my whole life, including a lot of time on second and third shift. If someone tried to put me to bet at 9 pm I would probably revolt too.
I have read that yes getting them more excercise during the day helps my friends sister brought her mother for a LONG walk everyday of course she fought and didnt want to go but the sister blackmailed her and said if she didnt go for a walk there would be no food as they had to go shopping?
Good luck and thankgod I dont have this yet?