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My Dad just recently moved in with us and for the life of me, I cant get him to take shower! any ideas??????

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Most elderly become hydrophobic at some point in their lives. Whether it is afraid of falling, the inability to smell themselves, or because they have forgotten that hygiene is a regular part of daily living, who knows? But it can present problems. It becomes uncomfortable for the son to bathe the mother or the daughter to bathe the father, so outside help is sometimes necessary. And sometimes it just boils down to a contest of wills and who will hold out the longest and who can stand the firmest! When my mil was still living with us, she had her own home attached to ours, and I would tell her twice a week to bathe....she would tell us she had and when I started really keeping track, she was running water and filling her tub but not getting in it. She had an "elderly" tub, with the door so she only had to step in and sit down. The day things changed, she was outside working in the garden and downwind the stench knocked me over. I enlisted the help of her son, my husband, to convince her to bathe and she preferred to fight and argue. It ended up with me stripping her down, putting her in the tub, and getting her clean. The adult diaper she had on was literally rotting off her. I took over the bathing from that day. I always made it fun for her, made sure the bathroom was toasty, warm towels.....when I had to start doing the actual washing, I still kept things light and got the job done......30 min from undressing to redressing. If needed, you must stand firm and get the job done. It not only is beneficial to your nose, it's healthier for your charge to have a clean body.
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Shower seats are inexpensive. After my dad had his stroke at age 89, I went out and bought an inexpensive hand-held attachment to replace the shower head; on a long hose to control where you spray it, or mounts up on the wall. Made showering much easier for him. when he was bed-ridden, he only had weekly showers with as-needed sponge baths.
I don't know if you are male or female, but it is possible that if you are the daughter and he needs help, he understandably balks. There are caregivers who can come in just for things like bathing if he doesn't need other assistance.
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I tell my Mom (86 years, with alzheimer's) that she has a Doctor's appointment. Then I say, "You want to be clean when they check you, don't you?" This usually gets her in the shower.
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I have to remind my Mom how good she feels after a shower! Sometimes elderly are like puppies...threy dread going in and after all the attention and washing and scrubbing, they come out all frisky and smiley!

I give my Mom the shower while she sits in a nice shower chair. I dry her and while I do it, I make goofy remarks, and sometimes I will get the towel stuck under her boob or her butt and prettend it is really stuck! I pull, and squirm, spin around and try to get it out..and she laughs her self silly! By the end of the shower and she is all dressed she feels wonderful! Humor really helps.

It's just that iitial hump to get her in there.
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Parents were at home and father was early 90's with dementia/alz kicking in. He did not want to take a shower and was a horrendous battle with mother. The geriatric doctor said that alz creates a huge fear of water going over the person's head so the shower thing is very common. We ended up having a home service person come in once a week for three hours and one of his jobs was to give my father a shower. My father was more accepting of that so it was money very well spent and lowered the family stress level. Hope this helps.
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Have you ever tried "waterless bath" products?? Used in hospital when lack of mobility made it impossible to get to bathrroom for shower. At home it sure beats fighting to get person into shower. Also, better than leaving soap on skin when it doesn't get completely washed off.
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I haven't figured this one out yet either. Mom (87) hasn't had a bath or shower in the six weeks since I moved in to help out. Dad (85) says she washes up at the sink, but I have no sense of smell and can't tell if she stinks or not. I do know for a fact that she only changes her clothes once or twice a week, because I do their laundry. Her bathroom tub/shower is fully fitted out with a chair, safety rails, etc., but I cannot convince Dad to help her bathe, and she won't let me help her because she thinks I'm the downstairs maid.
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I understand and have had issues with my mom. When mom was getting UTInfections, I used that as a good reason to bathe. I would remind mom that bathing helps the UTInfection. and then she wont have to take more medicine. And when mom was scratching and her scin was dry, I reminded her that bathing helped with the itching. I picked two days ( convenient for me) and it was easier after that. Also reminded her taking her bath when she was alone was not a good choice. Her judgement was not logical for safety. That's one of the reasons she is in LT NH . Mom does like bathing at the NH I have been told. Hope this helps.
Equinox
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I'm still very lost, my dad is only like 64 that's not old. His brother my uncle told us he's always been like that. I'd rather be dead than go 3 days without a shower. It's like he simply likes to stink. It really sux when I go to dating a girl I met and the time comes when she wants to meet the family. Then I say no then she thinks I'm ashamed of her or something. She's not the one I'm ashamed of. Can anybody help.
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I'm still very lost, my dad is only like 64 that's not old. His brother my uncle told us he's always been like that. I'd rather be dead than go 3 days without a shower. It's like he simply likes to stink. It really sux when I go to dating a girl I met and the time comes when she wants to meet the family. Then I say no then she thinks I'm ashamed of her or something. She's not the one I'm ashamed of. Can anybody help.
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