We have an appointment with his dr Monday to see if we can't get him put in the hospital for the rages and a skin cancer problem he has. He will have to go to the nursing home after those treatments but he doesnt know that and is going to be defiant and raging at us over this. It's about to kill us but we have no other way to handle it. Suggestions or advice?
The rages - recent, triggered by anything in particular, anything you've noticed about them?
We have no intention to bring him back home. Planning on him going to the hospital from the drs office tomorrow. The truth of the matter
is he should have had this done months ago, we just thought at his age we might pass away before it came to this. We never wanted to have to use this POA.
We have told our children but not anyone else. We just don't need others judging this decision. They are not having to go through this struggle of being a caregiver.
I think having him seen by a geriatric psychiatrist would be more useful. If you can get a medical opinion that he is not capable of making his own decisions, it will make it easier to place him in a care situation.
From what I've read, a POA, health care POA or even guardianship doesn't give you the right to put someone in a care home. It's something to do with the rights of the disabled. If he has enough wits to contest the placement, the courts will lean towards letting him make his own (bad) decisions.
https://www.agingcare.com/articles/legally-force-move-to-assisted-living-155888.htm
If getting him seen by a psychiatrist isn't possible, I would call the police the next time he is raging. If he seems dangerous to himself or others, they will take him to the ER and the hospital will be responsible to make sure he is discharged into a safe setting. Just do not agree to take him back home.
This is a very hard situation. I'm sorry.
Bless you!
I would appreciate all the prayers you could send up that the Lord will help us with the right answers.
THanks so much responding and listening to me vent!
Your friend
You will have to call the police and tell them that you have serious, immediate concerns for the physical welfare of the three of you involved. If you don’t have in your possession a statement in writing that he is unable to be responsible for his own welfare, request this document from one of the psychiatrists he’s seen in the past.
That document opened more doors for me in getting help for my LO, than the POA, and having received it, I would present the two documents together in every management situation that I encounter termed.
I do add your family to my prayers.
If he becomes dangerous to you or to himself, call 911.
Has the doc who is prescribing his meds recommended adjusting the dosages?