So, I have gotten help for trying to place grandma into a nursing home. Nobody in the family can take care of her. She had been in the hospital and a rehab center, and the person who was taking care of her is no longer able to. The rehab center CAN take her for long term care, but my mom says it's terrible. Every, literally, every other option is too expensive. It's even too much for medicare and medicaid to cover. Other than that she has no other money.
What are we suppose to do now? Just let her stay there?
From previous postings, you are only in your 20's, you shouldn't be handling all this on your own. Think of it as being good experience for you, something that you will carry with you the rest of your life, and you can relate to others who are in the same situation.
If by chance you find out she had assets you did not know about that put her over the top, which it does not sound like will happen, there are options called spend-down and Miller trust that usually do need eldercare legal consultation to set up correctly.
I sure wish you well! And, I hope you have POA papers in hand too...both medical and financial...if you don't, get them if at all possible, even if you need an eldercare attorney if the facility SW can't help enough, and keep copies handy with you as you go about doing things on GMs behalf.
One other thing - the nursing home may want to become representative payee, and if you are up to it, you may want to try to get that yourself to keep more control over the situation, but basically her check will be used to pay for her care other than a very small monthly personal allowance. You get that by going to the SSI office usually and doing an interview and yet more paperwork - it is separate from any POA.
The world of eldercare today comes with a steep learning curve and a lot of complexity to the systems. Facility SW can sometimes help, other times, they assume you know more than you do, and they may be somewhat interested in keeping her there if she is a nice, easy enough patient...or referring you to their favorite eldercare attorney who might not be any better than others who are less expensive. Dept on Aging as mentioned above or "Area Agency on Aging" might be able to explain more. And, we will help as best we can here with anything else you run into :-)
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