Just started a week or so ago. One morning decided she didn't want to get up. Didn't want to eat, brush teeth, play cards or walk. Says no to everything. She hasn't fallen or had any changes in medication. She is physically strong but has just lost her willingness to do anything. Screams all day for me to put her back to bed.
If you don't mind sharing, what medication did she get?
I worked really had for 1-1/2 yrs to get my MIL on Medicaid into a really nice AL facility thinking she'd really enjoy the activities, beautiful lakeside gardens and nice people. Nope. She steadfastly refuses to get out of bed. No reason. Just won't. She's 88 now in LTC and she has a lot of longevity in her family. Ugh.
On a related issue, I'm hoping you are getting compensated fairly for providing her care. You are giving up your opportunity for full-time employment where you might be receiving health/dental insurance, vacation, 401K, etc. Otherwise this is being "robbed" from your future even though you are voluntarily caring for her. Your gramma and whoever is her financial PoA should be doing this. I wish you all the best!
of abrupt behavior changes in the elderly.
Please let her decide what she will be doing for her days.
Staying in bed is okay as long as she is hydrating and being fed, if she wants to eat, as well as being moved every 2 hours to avoid bedsores.
You should prepare your heart for the inevitable. She could go anytime and you don't want to have regrets about anything.
God bless you for taking care of your grandmother.
When she goes back to bed or doesn’t want to get up, try just leaving her for awhile and then go in and visit with her. No pushing your agenda. Grandma, how did you get your fried chicken to be crispy? What was your favorite game as a child? Let me read you what I found on Aging Care today. doesn’t this sound like uncle wanting to drive? Anything except what you want her to do.
I know it’s difficult for you to switch gears. we are so accustomed to promoting healthy living that we forget that life comes to an end. It may be that a New written care plan will help you. One that addresses her wishes at this point in her life. If you haven’t already, call in hospice for an evaluation. They can help you identify issues and help keep her comfortable and provide you with support through transitions.
I think everyone would benefit from reading “Being Mortal, Medicine and What Matters in the End” by Atul Gawande.
Keep in touch and let us know how she is doing.
If grandmother will not eat, make sure you at least give her some supplemental nutrition shakes such as ensure. Try to get her to drink water, also.
Wow. Grandmother has been blessed with a very long life.
Antidepressant medication can be such a game changer!!