I am my Dad's POA and patient advocate. He is in assisted living and his mind is still sharp. I had to put him in assisted living because I can't take care of him anymore. He has accused me of yanking him out of his home, he asked me if the offer still stood to move in with me. I want someone to take over his financial matters so I don't get accused of stealing money.
Set up a financial journal. Just use a nice sized journal where you cannot tear out the pages. Write in columns, if it doesn't have the, to look like a checkbook. I know you already have a checkbook for his account(s) but in the journal you can write in details for each check if necessary and any explanation. The check to assisted living would need no explanation on a regular basis, but if 1 month your father needed something additional and the cost that month was higher, then you explain that in the journal. It is a bit of additional work but think it through, set up a few file folders, and all will be well.
Also, in my opinion, it wouldn't hurt to keep in touch with family members and when they ask about your dad (or bring it up yourself) say how he is doing and then anything you have done recently such as "his socks were getting pretty thin and there was an excellent sale at _______, so I bought him a dozen pair." By continuing this conversation you have a support system.
And remember to breathe. You are in this for the long haul. Been there - doing that.
Grace + Peace,,
Bob
When in doubt copy them - after a while of small boring emails they will be more aware of what you are doing too - I ask for visitation while I'm away of vacation but that rarely happens
I have a revocable living trust - which provides for a PFAC (Professional Fiduciary Association of California) member (that I have chosen) to take over for me as trustee in the event I am incapacitated or deceased (care for my pets will continue for their lifetimes under the trust - this could also be used for a spouse or other dependent.) The fiduciary is licensed and bonded and must act according to the terms of the trust. (I have no family I would want in this capacity). If your father is of sound mind e can still make this trust - and it sure will save a lot of problems when his time comes (If you have relatives who would give you problems now - just wait until it's time to "get their share".)
With the trust and a professional fiduciary problem solved.
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