My mother 93 with dementia sometimes is so nasty to me. She likes to sleep a lot in her recliner in the living room and jumps with every little noise. Then she yells at me, calls me a few choice words and tells me how inconsiderate I am for waking her up. I have to walk through to do laundry, cook, clean etc. Then tells me I do nothing for her. I quit my job to take care of her. I get very upset, my feelings get hurt and in two minutes she forgets the whole thing happened, but I don't. How do you all handle this?
Might as well be hung for a sheep as a lamb, eh?
Or, move her recliner. To her bedroom.
People with chronic illnesses, especially dementia, do a lot of unpleasant things they can't help doing. They may fall a lot. They drool. They have bathroom accidents or become incontinent. They say insulting things. This is all part of the package. The falling, drooling, and incontinence are not done deliberately to upset or inconvenience you. And neither is making insulting remarks. Your mom has damage to her brain. It always helped me to remember that!
Cherish every minute that she is NOT nasty to you. Remember that as your real mom. If would help, come here to vent when she is nasty -- we understand! Or maybe keeping a log about it would help you.
The thing that helps me most is when I get out so I can talk to people. Talking to other people always makes me feel like things are not so hopeless. Today I even met a guy I really liked. I hope I'll run into him again. I don't have anything to offer anyone right now, but it felt good being around someone who was flirting. It was like a dose of good medicine for what ails me -- loneliness.