I was wondering how people decide which of the two is best for their elderly parent. My Mother is 84 years old, with Alzheimer's/Dementia which the major challenge, but also has two torn rotator cuffs, bad legs and feet from a back condition. Although we are struggling. really struggling we are able to take care of Mom at home with the help of a home attendant.
The question I have is.....How can you tell or decide if your elderly parent is better at home or a nursing home?
At home, she does nothing and just sits a stares at a TV all day.
A Nursing home although you lose your privacy, there are people, activities and professional people that can help with this terrible disease.
My family and I go back and forth on what to do. Any suggestions?
PS: My Dad sits in the front of the TV a lot, though I'm not sure whether he's watching it or just dozing or just staring into space. Compared to his agitation and obsessions of sundowning, I'd rather have him sitting quietly (hopefully) in front of the TV!
I am trying to focus more on what is actually better for my Mom. she gets so agitated when the home attendants show up, and calls the agency 3 to 5 times a day. we worry that having the home attendant is constant stress on my Mother who refuses to even lay on the couch when they are here, she forces herself to sit up. My Mother rather that we be there all day for her, but that is just not possible and she cannot be alone. she has fallen multiple times. refuses to wear the life alert device we got for her, and has trouble remembering telephone numbers.
I hear positive and negative comments about nursing homes. I have a good friend who's mother called him constantly. She also has dementia. They put her in a home and she loves the attention and activities. Others tell me, there parents do not like it and are not doing well.
Such a hard thing to decide, and that is not even taking into consideration an opening in the home, and if she qualifies.