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Kbran2022: Speak to the hospice nurse. That individual should be able to outline exactly what will transpire. Feel free to pose the questions that you require to be answered. Hugs sent during this most difficult of times.
Be careful with Hospice! While it is good to get extra care (if the caregiver is good), they will do NOTHING to help your mother if she is having a medical issue. Be very careful of words like 'actively dying'. It is a term I found they use when they are killing them through neglect!!! Make sure that she always has enough water and food. That is one way they will try to kill a patient. That is how they killed my sister. By denying her all food and water. When they said she was actively dying. I asked from what. They could not tell me ...because she was NOT dying. They just decided it was time for her to die and they no longer wanted to care for her. They tried to use the excuse that she was not eating or drinking on her own. Well she needed help walking since they would not assist her to go get the food or water ...they let her suffer.
You can accept the hospice for now ...but you can ALWAYS refuse it again at any moment you feel that she needs medical care. They will even try to refuse the most simple things to save her. Don't let them get away with that. Many people are being killed in homes and hospitals especially right now when they try to prevent loved ones from visiting.
Hospice can be a blessing or a curse! Please keep an eye on whoever you choose to care for her and be active in what is going on.
There may be some confusion the way the OP phrased the question. To be clear, the patient or the guardian approves hospice. The decision is not made by doctors unless it is in a few European countries. It is offered by the family as an option. The way it is described here is phrased like it is euthanasia, which it is not. If the patient does not want to eat or drink, does not ask for anything, then only offerings are given. The main goal is comfort care and the rule of rescue is changed.
To the OP, a SNF is a skilled nursing facility or NH.
My Mom was in a NH on Hospice. I really was not involved. Mom was actively dying. Swallowing was the first thing to go. Thats when Hospice was called in. I was there for intake. Whats nice about Hospice in a facility is there is always someone there to care for Mom. So when the Hospice staff was not there, the facilities staff did the work. You just visit. Home Hospice means the family does most of the work.
I think the only thing you need to know is that Mom will be kept comfortable. Morphine will be given for pain and ease of breathing. Anxiety meds might be needed. Food and drink maybe stopped when signs that the body shutting down start. Giving food and water do more harm if the body is shutting down. Mom may sleep most of the time. Ask questions.
Hospice was a Godsend for both my parents..RNs, office staff, Chaplain, LSW, etc were great. All staff were readily available for questions, concerns, peace of mind.
Morphine for comfort, bathing, alternating pressure mattress, wound care, etc..Grief counseling to help you, as well.
Thoughts are with you/Mom, in this final chapter. Hospice was a Blessing during this very emotional journey. 🙏🏻❤️🤗
No dementia, just old age mental decline. Back in 2014, my 95-year old mother had a palliative nurse visit every day for the last three weeks of her life. My local brother stayed overnight with her at least two days until she peacefully passed away. Morphine for pain and oxygen provided for her difficulty breathing due to heart failure. DNR requested on the authorized POLSTI with only comfort.
MC may not provide feeding assistance in her room when eating declines. The same goes with bathing once bedridden. I was asked about mom being bumped up to SNF, but she passed within the next few days. A lot will depend on her rapid decline. You may choose to visit her during a lunch or dinner to offer food, or hire an extra hand maybe to visit from noon to 4 with the intent of offering some food and drink. Just remember that if she chooses not to take nourishment then she is transitioning.
My mom is in MC with dementia and is bedridden. She’s been on hospice care now for a year. I live out of state and was so grateful for the extra layer of care. As others here have said, it’s like having an extra set of eyes on Mom. I haven’t told my mom she’s on hospice care because she’s coherent enough to know what that means for some patients and I didn’t want to upset her. Anyway, like others have said here, it’s a Godsend.
In in Pennsylvania memory care, my mom’s hospice came 5x a week for 1 hour. Included aide, nurse manager, chaplain, when my mom went to skilled nursing: 3 x times a week
If you have a choice of what hospice to use, ask the MC which one is used the most by families there. That'll be the one whose staff will work most seamlessly with the MC staff.
Hospice while in MC is wonderful, because that hospice nurse is another set of eyes on your mom and ONLY on your mom for the duration of the visit. If that nurse also has other patients there, she'll be noticing little things about your mom while visiting her other patients, too, and can do a quick check on her if needed even if it's not Mom's day for an official visit.
My mother was on hospice in MC for the last seven months of her life, and it was a huge load off my mind as we switched to focusing on the quality of her life from the quantity of her life. Her nurse was wonderful, let me come to assist her on her visits to Mom when she did her wound care, and as that was still during the Covid lockdown, she enabled me to spend valuable time with Mom when visitors weren't allowed.
Your mom's hospice nurse will become your friend and support, too, if you're there enough of the times when she is. I cherish that nurse to this day, even though Mom's been gone over a year now and she's moved on to help other families.
Hospice can not duplicate services the facility provides, I should say the facility will not duplicate Hospice services. So if Hospice CNA's bathe or shower mom the facility staff will no longer bathe or shower her. You will also get support from the Hospice team. If mom needs a better bed or mattress than the one she has it will be provided. Hospice will also provide briefs aka diapers, wipes, creams, ointments, gloves and medications will also be provided. The Hospice team will manage pain and symptoms. Hospice can also provide a Volunteer that can come in and visit mom. Hospice was the best decision I made, it made the others easy because I had support
Each Hospice is a bit different. Your question is best addressed to the intake people at your own Hospice. Speak with them and have your list of questions ready. Be certain to discuss your Mom's and your own expectations. You tell us very little. Hospice is sometimes ordered by MDs who, due to age of patient can fudge the "expectation patient will not survive more than 6 months into future" requirement for coverage by Medicare. They order it for the extra care and support of Nurse, Aids and bathing, Social Worker, Family support, Clergy support and etc. However, sometimes death is imminent, and the thought of how best to provide comfort is foremost. This is why I suggest you discuss your OWN MOM with your OWN HOSPICE provider. When I was an RN Hospice was such a godsend and it was not nearly the military-industrial complex participant it is today. The nurses and aids and clergy were allowed what time the patient and family required. Today it is down to one aid two times a week for bath, RN as needed for medications, and etc. Hospice can (or need not) provide drugs to keep your loved one comfortable. By its very mission it is end of life COMFORT CARE and comfort is foremost. There will now be no further hospitalizations for testing and treatment. We all are familiar here with hospice. Please know you can visit us with questions, but also know that your own hospice can best answer your questions and that's what they are there for, as well as for the comfort of your Mom. Be certain to discuss any issues with them first. Wishing you good luck, and comfort and peace for your Mom.
A lot of help and support. My Mom has just started at home hospice and they come out a couple of times a week to bathe her and a nurse comes out and checks on her. We, the family and the patient, have meetings or chats with a social worker and a preacher. If need be, volunteers will come and hold her hand and spend time with her. Any supplies are provided without charge. It's been a blessing
Speak to the hospice nurse directly and ask a lot of questions so you'll know exactly what to expect. Ask for their handbook outlining protocols, and be sure you know precisely how hospice works in that your mother will not be transported to the hospital anymore unless there is a very specific extenuating circumstance going on, like a broken bone that needs to be cast. We get A LOT of posts here from people who did not understand what hospice was all about, and then say 'hospice killed my mother' when that's not how they operate at all. Comfort drugs ARE administered, however, so do ask lots of questions about how those are doled out as well.
I had 2 very good experiences with hospice for both of my parents, dad in 2015 and mom who passed in February while living in Memory Care. Hospice kept both of them comfortable and out of pain during their final days, and also provided me with comfort and counsel every step of the way. They brought in a hospital bed & supplies for my folks also, which proved to be very useful. I kept in constant contact with the hospice RN and she even gave me her cell phone number so I could text her with questions & concerns about mom's care. I was able to ask for mom's meds to be increased if I saw that she was agitated, and the nurse was able to read my text and get that authorization approved from the doctor in charge.
Wishing you the best of luck with a difficult situation.
My mom went on hospice while in memory care. The hospice nurse came out for assessment. Along with a social worker. The nurse came weekly, a cna , twice a week. A chaplain 3 times a month, social worker monthly. Also social worker found a volunteer to visit every 2 weeks… more eyes ! Chaplain was the highlight for my mom.
Hospice nurse worked in conjunction with nurse practitioner overseeing my mom
hospice will provide depends , chux, soaps lotions etc.
will monitor and provide medications as needed.
they brought in a hospital tray table, a hospital bed , a wheelchair, as things progressed. Changed wheelchair to a Geri chair, then the hoyer lift.
nurse called me with updates every week. Twice I had to call hospice on the weekend for support. On call nurse came out and saw my mom. They are a Godsend !
at the end Hospice will handle the arrangements to funeral home etc. I did not tell my mom she was on hospice. I told her it was the special program I found. I wish you peace with the transition of life
Did your mom have dementia? Our experience was that the social worker extensively questioned my MIL on her end of life wishes to make sure Hospice was her decision, she was not being influenced by someone else, etc. They covered quite a few details such as feeding tube, IV hydration, etc. MIL had cancer but was able to make her own healthcare decisions. My husband had POA but it was never activated.
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
Information for you from the authorities. If you have issues, contact their ombudsman for clarity.
You can accept the hospice for now ...but you can ALWAYS refuse it again at any moment you feel that she needs medical care. They will even try to refuse the most simple things to save her. Don't let them get away with that. Many people are being killed in homes and hospitals especially right now when they try to prevent loved ones from visiting.
Hospice can be a blessing or a curse! Please keep an eye on whoever you choose to care for her and be active in what is going on.
To the OP, a SNF is a skilled nursing facility or NH.
I think the only thing you need to know is that Mom will be kept comfortable. Morphine will be given for pain and ease of breathing. Anxiety meds might be needed. Food and drink maybe stopped when signs that the body shutting down start. Giving food and water do more harm if the body is shutting down. Mom may sleep most of the time. Ask questions.
Hospice was a Godsend for both my parents..RNs, office staff, Chaplain, LSW, etc were great. All staff were readily available for questions, concerns, peace of mind.
Morphine for comfort, bathing, alternating pressure mattress, wound care, etc..Grief counseling to help you, as well.
Thoughts are with you/Mom, in this final chapter. Hospice was a Blessing during this very emotional journey. 🙏🏻❤️🤗
Thanks
Hospice while in MC is wonderful, because that hospice nurse is another set of eyes on your mom and ONLY on your mom for the duration of the visit. If that nurse also has other patients there, she'll be noticing little things about your mom while visiting her other patients, too, and can do a quick check on her if needed even if it's not Mom's day for an official visit.
My mother was on hospice in MC for the last seven months of her life, and it was a huge load off my mind as we switched to focusing on the quality of her life from the quantity of her life. Her nurse was wonderful, let me come to assist her on her visits to Mom when she did her wound care, and as that was still during the Covid lockdown, she enabled me to spend valuable time with Mom when visitors weren't allowed.
Your mom's hospice nurse will become your friend and support, too, if you're there enough of the times when she is. I cherish that nurse to this day, even though Mom's been gone over a year now and she's moved on to help other families.
You will also get support from the Hospice team. If mom needs a better bed or mattress than the one she has it will be provided. Hospice will also provide briefs aka diapers, wipes, creams, ointments, gloves and medications will also be provided. The Hospice team will manage pain and symptoms. Hospice can also provide a Volunteer that can come in and visit mom.
Hospice was the best decision I made, it made the others easy because I had support
You tell us very little. Hospice is sometimes ordered by MDs who, due to age of patient can fudge the "expectation patient will not survive more than 6 months into future" requirement for coverage by Medicare. They order it for the extra care and support of Nurse, Aids and bathing, Social Worker, Family support, Clergy support and etc. However, sometimes death is imminent, and the thought of how best to provide comfort is foremost.
This is why I suggest you discuss your OWN MOM with your OWN HOSPICE provider. When I was an RN Hospice was such a godsend and it was not nearly the military-industrial complex participant it is today. The nurses and aids and clergy were allowed what time the patient and family required. Today it is down to one aid two times a week for bath, RN as needed for medications, and etc.
Hospice can (or need not) provide drugs to keep your loved one comfortable. By its very mission it is end of life COMFORT CARE and comfort is foremost. There will now be no further hospitalizations for testing and treatment.
We all are familiar here with hospice. Please know you can visit us with questions, but also know that your own hospice can best answer your questions and that's what they are there for, as well as for the comfort of your Mom. Be certain to discuss any issues with them first.
Wishing you good luck, and comfort and peace for your Mom.
My Mom has just started at home hospice and they come out a couple of times a week to bathe her and a nurse comes out and checks on her.
We, the family and the patient, have meetings or chats with a social worker and a preacher.
If need be, volunteers will come and hold her hand and spend time with her.
Any supplies are provided without charge.
It's been a blessing
I had 2 very good experiences with hospice for both of my parents, dad in 2015 and mom who passed in February while living in Memory Care. Hospice kept both of them comfortable and out of pain during their final days, and also provided me with comfort and counsel every step of the way. They brought in a hospital bed & supplies for my folks also, which proved to be very useful. I kept in constant contact with the hospice RN and she even gave me her cell phone number so I could text her with questions & concerns about mom's care. I was able to ask for mom's meds to be increased if I saw that she was agitated, and the nurse was able to read my text and get that authorization approved from the doctor in charge.
Wishing you the best of luck with a difficult situation.
Hospice nurse worked in conjunction with nurse practitioner overseeing my mom
hospice will provide depends , chux, soaps lotions etc.
will monitor and provide medications as needed.
they brought in a hospital tray table, a hospital bed , a wheelchair, as things progressed. Changed wheelchair to a Geri chair, then the hoyer lift.
nurse called me with updates every week. Twice I had to call hospice on the weekend for support. On call nurse came out and saw my mom. They are a Godsend !
at the end Hospice will handle the arrangements to funeral home etc.
I did not tell my mom she was on hospice. I told her it was the special program I found.
I wish you peace with the transition of life