My son is receiving daily verbal/physical abuse from my mother whom has Dementia. He is on felony parole, currently doing treatment for meth addiction and was just released from Charter Ridge (psycological/drug treatment) in Lexington KY . I am her youngest son, my fiance and I tried living & helping her twice; the first time I was hit in the face after bleach being thrown into my eyes, the next time she attacked my fiance for no reason. I have two other brothers, one doesn't go around her and the other came in from N.C. and put everything in my son's hands. He's at wits end and fearing the next terms of events, his freedom due to being on parole or if he may lash out physically. He has a small child that is suffering as well !!
Please what can I do ???
For your son, the short answer is STAY AWAY from the abusive person who can trigger him into violence, hence violating his parole.
However, I am guessing things aren't as simple. Does your son (and grandson) have another place to stay. If not, can he keep away from your mother while living in the same house, like staying in his room. He should STOP helping her, and being near her. You're saying that your son's son is suffering. That's understandable. My kids can't stand being near my Alz. mother either.
Both your son and your mother need help, but they can't help one another.
Caring for a dementia patient is very difficult for one person, any person. In this case, the patient is violent putting the caregiver under extreme pressure which temps him to respond in kind.
Your mother needs help, too. Can you give more info as to her ability to afford outside help? Have you checked to see if she is qualified to receive help from the county/state?
As to how to place her into a nursing home, can you talk to her doctor? What are her needs?
911 should be called when she becomes violent. She is a danger to herself and others.
I don’t want to appear unsympathetic to your mom but clearly she is unstable and needs closer supervision by medical professionals that are qualified to do so.
Contact her social worker and ask for assistance in helping you plan to have her placed in a facility.
Best wishes to you and your family. I wish your son well. I hope that he continues in his recovery and has peace and joy in his remaining years.