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I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
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V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
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Could you tell us a little more please? The easiest way would probably just to tell him to stop and if he won't, then don't bring your son around. How old are they? What brings the name calling about?
the son caregives and lives with the dad. son is being called names and wont stop. any suggestions would help lots. thank you so much. son is 60 and dad is 85.
Since your son is 60 it would probably be good for him to deal with it. If my mother called me stupid (I'm almost 64) I would tell her I had inherited it from her side of the family.
What are the dad's impairments? Does he have dementia? Personality disorder? Is this a recent change in his mental status ( which might signal a uti, stroke or some other physical event)? What was his relationship like with the son prior to caregiving? Is he randomly calling the son stupid, or only in regard to certain tasks?
It's good of you to be raising the point. Are you the sort of friend who can invite the son to discuss how he's coping? I think supporting him, rather than hoping to tackle the father's behaviour, is probably more likely to be successful. If the father's abusiveness (and it is abuse) is getting more extreme and is related to any kind of mental decline it would be very difficult for you to work on it directly.
thank you so much for your thoughtful answer. your points are well taken. i will focus on supporting the son. are there any other good caregiver websites.
Cathy I'm in the UK where we have a few sites to choose from, and I can say hand-on-heart that I haven't found a better one than AgingCare. The individuals here are amazingly knowledgeable and supportive, and - perhaps because it is an American site? - the attitude is refreshingly positive. There are quite a few chaps contributing: you might like to suggest to the son that he logs on and has a look round. Or, you could try searching for topics you think might be relevant and show him the discussions.
It depends how you think he might feel about opening up about things. It can be difficult and painful to acknowledge that there is a problem in the first place - does he, do you think?
Get you and them together and have a discussion about the issue, get all to agree to stop it and then have the remind his dad as one post said here, "I got it from you" Stop being offended and make light of it knowing this is just your elderly father who could be acting out his fear of being elderly and nearing his end of life. Hope this helps. God bless you for your care. If this doesn't stop or you can't/won't put up with this then let him know you won't help him any more.
A visit from APS Adult Protection Services might be the thing the son (caregiver) needs.... Sometimes a little accountability for our actions goes a Long Way.
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
So I assume your Dad doesn't need care.. If your Mom is in her 90's then again I assume your son is an adult and should just avoid him...
What does the son think? Are you anxious about signs of emotional wear and tear in him?
It depends how you think he might feel about opening up about things. It can be difficult and painful to acknowledge that there is a problem in the first place - does he, do you think?