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I have a soon to be 89 aunt. She is my late father's oldest sister & she has NO children. She was always a wonderful aunt and had a great male companion in a small apartment, he is 96. She started to forget to take her medication, got some memory loss, had poor nutrition & even when I tried to help, she never followed a good care for heself. Memory was a big issue. She recently fell down & broke her right hip femur having emergency surgery. 2 months later, still in rehab hospital. Recently the roommate family decided to take him being that I told them that she could no longer care for herself much less cook or care for him because of her multiple health issues (high blood pressure, TIAs, heart stents, fall risk and more)...I have decided witth social worker that ALF is the best suitable option. I feel so bad and sad for my aunt. At 42, with 2 kids and a busy career, and a insanely busy professional life, I can't have her @my home. I am paying for some portion of her care because she was on Medicare & Medicaid but I wish I could do lots more for her!! I feel so bad & sad for her.

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Sobrina, take heart, my mother in law moved to Assisted Living and met people that she had not seen in many years, people from her old neighborhood. The facility had 80 residents, so she was constantly in the company of old friends. Your aunt would be alone in your house during the day, but this way she will have activities and meals with good company.
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Yes, your aunt will now be a part of a much larger community, where she will be around others and will have people checking on her throughout the day. Her food will be more consistent and her care will be too. So you're doing the right thing! And I'm sure your aunt appreciates your care and love. Look at it this way, your aunt has someone who loves her and is watching out for her, which is a lot more than many people at her age have!
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THANK YOU ALL for your words and for taking the time to answer. It's true that love can heal pain.
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What does your Aunt have to say about all of this?
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RainMom...Thanks for answering.. My aunt is noble, nice and gentle in nature. She is super sweet and thanks me every morning I go see her or call her at the rehab for helping her this way, but I guess I wish I could do more for her, I feel she deserves the best!!....We are immigrants from Cuba. She had a harsh life defending the American way there and after 1959 was help capture as a political prisoner for openly expressing her love for USA and her dislike for communism, this cost her 10 years in political prison but the Human Rights Association was able to intervene then and they brought her to a better place: USA. This was when she was younger...point being, I feel like she done so much for human rights, people, ideals...and now even as an American Citizen can't enjoy her senior years and probably the last ones of her life. I guess I wish I could do more!!
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There is no reason to feel bad. You are doing the best you can to help out your aunt because you love and care about her. Know your limitations. Accept the help when it is offered to you. I suggest when you visit your aunt, to take her outdoors and have her get some sunlight and fresh air. It will benefit her health and boost her mood. It will also benefit you too as her caregiver. That is what i do when i go visit my grandpa at his nursing home. It makes a difference to his wellbeing. Theres alot of research done on the health benefits of sunlight when done in moderation. We do at least 15-20 minutes per day. Hope this helps!
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