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Who are you caring for?
Which best describes their mobility?
How well are they maintaining their hygiene?
How are they managing their medications?
Does their living environment pose any safety concerns?
Fall risks, spoiled food, or other threats to wellbeing
Are they experiencing any memory loss?
Which best describes your loved one's social life?
Acknowledgment of Disclosures and Authorization
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment. You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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I acknowledge and authorize
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I consent to the collection of my consumer health data.*
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I consent to the sharing of my consumer health data with qualified home care agencies.*
*If I am consenting on behalf of someone else, I have the proper authorization to do so. By clicking Get My Results, you agree to our Privacy Policy. You also consent to receive calls and texts, which may be autodialed, from us and our customer communities. Your consent is not a condition to using our service. Please visit our Terms of Use. for information about our privacy practices.
Mostly Independent
Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
Remember, this assessment is not a substitute for professional advice.
Share a few details and we will match you to trusted home care in your area:
Such a shame when children have to deal with Parents past decisions. How do you stop a long time drinker, don't think you can. He has to do it himself. No amount of talking is going to help. All you can do is refuse to contribute to the problem.
Why don't you see if there is a meeting near you for families of Alcoholics. It may help you find ways to help him.
I had a hard time with my dad. When doctor put him on prescription meds for memory (Aricept), we were able to explain to him that the medicine absolutely would not work if he continued to drink. He stopped because he realized how serious things were getting. He was still in fairly early stages of dementia at that point.
Backstory: my dad had become a later-in-life alcoholic. Sadly, he and my mom spent a lot of their retirement years sitting in the house drinking wine all day (starting at 7 AM and passing out mid day, then starting up again later). This was to the exclusion of food/nutrition. This lifestyle severely damaged them both. Dad was in a memory care facility by the time he was 78. Mom has trashed her equilibrium and started having bizarre falls around the age of 69. Now only 76, she has broken her hand (which never healed properly), her shoulder (which never healed properly) and most recently her back. She uses a walker and may end up in a wheelchair soon.
If I would have known this is the way they would choose to live I would have never moved back to this town. Now I feel stuck and wish there was a way to escape the fallout of their lifestyle. Run away if you can!!!
(((hugs, upstream))) Your burden is unique. The stress must be unreal. Commit yourself to creating regular breaks that are the opposite of “all that.” [Even if you just lock yourself in the bathroom for 5 minutes, put your fingers in your ears and sing a happy song!] You are strong and awesome. Take care of yourself.
Good Luck ! With the drinking I wish I had an answer! The people that like to drink sometimes always will drink hopefully slow down ..my dad drank but he only drank like 1 to4 beers at night towards the end ....I remember I had residents that would keep beer or wine in their little frige they never got like drunk but they did get tipsey the only thing that worrys me about the drinking is tooo much then we risk falls , gee willikers Wish I had an answer I cant get my husband to stop drinking beer!! Not to make a joke of it good luck
I got my mother's suicidal-level drinking to functioning alcoholic levels (functioning but if not for her other problems!) She is a whiskey user and at time of my starting her reduction she had 15 drinks a day.
I did everything you are not supposed to do. I hid the bottles after so much was imbibed, I openly shamed her for drinking more than two drinks in a row, and when she binged I surreptitiously diluted the bottles and her glasses so the binge was actually her normal level. I did this for a full year and her physical dependency stepped down so the urge to drink would be greatly reduced.
And it worked, my entire family is amazed because she has gone back to a level of use that from a decade ago (two to four drinks a day) and maintains that lower use level on her own.
Is he mobile? If he can't drive then get some smaller bottles and start stepping him down. If he has enough sense to ration what he has, you can greatly reduce intake this way.
Is he mobile and able to get the liquor but not totally with it? Dilute it by a quarter to a third and see if he notices.
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
How do you stop a long time drinker, don't think you can. He has to do it himself. No amount of talking is going to help. All you can do is refuse to contribute to the problem.
Why don't you see if there is a meeting near you for families of Alcoholics. It may help you find ways to help him.
Backstory: my dad had become a later-in-life alcoholic. Sadly, he and my mom spent a lot of their retirement years sitting in the house drinking wine all day (starting at 7 AM and passing out mid day, then starting up again later). This was to the exclusion of food/nutrition. This lifestyle severely damaged them both. Dad was in a memory care facility by the time he was 78. Mom has trashed her equilibrium and started having bizarre falls around the age of 69. Now only 76, she has broken her hand (which never healed properly), her shoulder (which never healed properly) and most recently her back. She uses a walker and may end up in a wheelchair soon.
If I would have known this is the way they would choose to live I would have never moved back to this town. Now I feel stuck and wish there was a way to escape the fallout of their lifestyle. Run away if you can!!!
I did everything you are not supposed to do. I hid the bottles after so much was imbibed, I openly shamed her for drinking more than two drinks in a row, and when she binged I surreptitiously diluted the bottles and her glasses so the binge was actually her normal level. I did this for a full year and her physical dependency stepped down so the urge to drink would be greatly reduced.
And it worked, my entire family is amazed because she has gone back to a level of use that from a decade ago (two to four drinks a day) and maintains that lower use level on her own.
Is he mobile? If he can't drive then get some smaller bottles and start stepping him down. If he has enough sense to ration what he has, you can greatly reduce intake this way.
Is he mobile and able to get the liquor but not totally with it? Dilute it by a quarter to a third and see if he notices.