This is more a warning than a question. My father died in 2010. In 2011 my sister took my mother to a lawyer and had my mother sign an agreement stating that should a guardian be required it would be her. A lot has happened since then. I am my mother’s healthcare POA and my sister is her financial POA. I have been my mother's full time care giver, until this pandemic, even though she entered memory care in January, against my wishes. Since my sister handles the finances she made the decision to put her there. My mother was very insistent that I make her medical decisions and should something happen to me, my brother take over. She made it very clear she did not trust my other 5 siblings to do what was best for her medically. My sister refused to share the 2011 document with the other 6 of us. My sister has refused to purchase my mother a decent chair and bed. She will not spend more than an hour a week with her. She’s fine with letting the facility make decisions for my mother. I know it is not what my mother wanted. She did sign this agreement in 2011 but I don’t think she was aware of what she was doing. She was very clear to me that she did not want one family member to be in charge of everything. Since I have given up my job to care for my mom I don’t have the money for a lawyer so I have no option but to let this happen. Please make sure everyone in the family get a copy of everything that’s signed so your loved ones wishes can be honored. It was my understanding that POAs were appointed they were honored. I had no idea this could happen! My siblings are saying nothings going to change. They have no idea how much care my mother actually requires. I hope this prevents this situation from happening to another family.
God Bless