Sister is nine years younger and I have health issues (hypertension, arthritis, blindness in one eye and almost deaf) Desire to move to warmer climate but still be involved in their lives. Sister has become very toxic and bitter and I choose not to respond but only with calm demeanor. My parents needs are being met (by facility) and I visit one time weekly (due to Covid restrictions) phone calls everyday. I have to decide about my own psycho/social well-being first. Suggestions of how to not sever family ties but move and not lose my sister?
Your own needs need to be addressed. You have decided this move will work best for you. Make it. That doesn't mean people will not be sad/angry, whatever they choose to be. But you must get on with your life. Respond gently that you feel sorry that they are so upset, but that you must do what you think is best for you. If they choose to feel you are selfish that is up to them. You cannot control the feelings or actions of others. Just your own. I wish you such good luck.