I've been my mom's caregiver for so long and at the moment her nagging and demands and questions are becoming so heavy for me to deal with. I feel like I have this weight on my shoulders that never recedes. I feel anxious, I feel alone, I feel like her attitude around me is causing me to be negative. The only time I feel at peace is at night when my husband comes home and I spend time with him.
I feel so fearful all the time and I am trying to stay positive.
Any advice?
It will take some energy at first, but you need to round up some help, whether it's from friends, family, or social services.
Can you get some respite care? It sounds as if you need some time for yourself. If she is mobile, you might want to ask a friend to take her some place for the day so you can have peace in your home. This would be a big favor to ask of your friend, but I'll bet your friends would like to help. If this isn't possible, is there adult daycare? Or some simple activity at a senior center where you can drop her off and escape for a few hours?
Can you adopt a sleeping pattern that;s different from hers? That way you could get up a few hours earlier than she does and have some lovely time for yourself.
I know how you feel. I think you need to have as much time to be your own #1 priority as you spend making her your priority. The big problem is that there is not much help out there unless you can twist some arms.