We had to move our mother into a nursing home. She was not happy about it. But she needed around the clock care. Recently, a lady across the hall passed away. She was propped up in the bed, door open! The ONLY requirement the facility has to do is pull the curtain around if the family wants privacy. Mother has experienced this in the past with her own roommate but I didn't realize how bad it had affected her. And who wouldn't be affected? But she left her room..wondered the halls so the family could be with their loved one. Gave up her side of the room and chair because she felt they needed the privacy. Administrator found her a room to stay in a day or so later until her roommate passed away. Why? Why is it not the nursing homes responsibility to provide privacy for the resident and their family during the final days? What can be done to change this?
I can understand your being upset about it, I would be too.
All I can think of is to talk to admin, and ask for a roommate equal, or as close to, your Mom's condition of health as possible. To be frank, not a roomie with one foot in the ground.
Then I'd bring this to the attention of the executive board. Since immediate admin are already aware of it.
Tough situation, good luck.
Because I have to say, reading your post, I am more aghast at the thought of an elderly resident of a nursing home being required to share her *bedroom* - her inner sanctum - with a person who is actively dying.
I mean. For Heaven's sake! It's sick, is what it is.
I think you are more likely to get somewhere, though, by applying pressure to the owners of the facility where your mother is living to make better provision for end of life care. This is partly because changes in social policy legislation tend to move slower than the mills of God, so that quite honestly we'll all be long gone by the time they get round to it... And partly because you want to be careful what you wish for.
I do, I admit, continue to be surprised at how few single rooms seem to be available in the States, and how common it is for people to share. But if legislation is used to make shared rooms effectively illegal - or at least so close to it that most providers ditch them altogether - there are unintended consequences, which might include established friendships being broken up, reduced choice for people who *are* naturally gregarious and don't want to be on their own, even fewer places for married couples, home providers going out of business, and of course escalating costs which mean that the whole funding circus is in more of a mess than ever.
Roommate moved for 48 hours and was wallowing in Cherry Vanilla.
Failure to provide appropriate care at the end of life should be brought to the attention of the administrator and owners to prevent this from happening in the future.