Are you sure you want to exit? Your progress will be lost.
Who are you caring for?
Which best describes their mobility?
How well are they maintaining their hygiene?
How are they managing their medications?
Does their living environment pose any safety concerns?
Fall risks, spoiled food, or other threats to wellbeing
Are they experiencing any memory loss?
Which best describes your loved one's social life?
Acknowledgment of Disclosures and Authorization
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment. You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
✔
I acknowledge and authorize
✔
I consent to the collection of my consumer health data.*
✔
I consent to the sharing of my consumer health data with qualified home care agencies.*
*If I am consenting on behalf of someone else, I have the proper authorization to do so. By clicking Get My Results, you agree to our Privacy Policy. You also consent to receive calls and texts, which may be autodialed, from us and our customer communities. Your consent is not a condition to using our service. Please visit our Terms of Use. for information about our privacy practices.
Mostly Independent
Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
Remember, this assessment is not a substitute for professional advice.
Share a few details and we will match you to trusted home care in your area:
I don't know about each state but in Maryland, if you are mentioned in a will at all, you should be notified by mail. I don't know the timeline for that but I would think that you would not have to seek out the information, it should come to you.
My sympathies, and my compliments to you on your kindness to your late aunt.
The executor is responsible for tracking down the beneficiaries of a will; so in due course your cousin should get round to notifying you of any legacy due to you.
With my cynical hat on, I would sigh that the correct procedure is to swallow your own tongue with frustration while the executor dillies about doing heaven only knows what for the Rest of Time, apparently unaware that the courtesy of a little information might be appreciated by all concerned.
But doffing that hat: if you're in social contact with your cousin anyway, there's no harm or bad manners in asking what the form is. And if the estate is sizeable or complex or involved, there is a fair bit of work to be done - so you might pat him or her on the head for that, too.
I wanted to say that I appreciate your concern regarding etiquette and sensitivity. So many suddenly caring relatives show up at the funeral with their hands out - demanding their "fair share" - when there's nothing fair about it. Here in Oregon you are also notified by the court or the attorney handling probate. Of course, that depends on your cousin actually filing probate and in a timely manner. Since you say that this cousin did not have a close relationship with your aunt I wouldn't overly worry about her/his feelings. Still - it seems only right to give it a month. You can also go to the court house in the county where your aunt lived to see if probate has been started before you approache your cousin. If it were me - if you do ask your cousin, I'd keep it short and simple - "before Aunt Bea passed away she told me she left me a little something in her will - I just wanted to check".
I think the will is probated in the county the person lived in. The executor named in the will can start probate 9 or 11 days after the death, not before. If no will then probate will assign n administrator. I live in NJ and from the info I have, the executor has 60 days to notify the people mentioned in the will. Doesn't mean they get the inheritance. All debts have to be satisfied before any money is given out. Now I may be wrong, but I think once the will is probated it's public? Just because the executor is suppose to honor the will means they will. If they don't, they can be taken to court.
My hubby was his dad's POA. He began writing checks to cover funeral expenses immediately. (His name was on the checking acct for years prior). I know hubs went and got about 20 certified death certificates (everybody wanted one) and he just got down to business--no probate, no lawyers or courts involved. Just paid bills, closed down accounts, sold his rental property, emptied the house--all just like a check list. He didn't make the final disbursement until we KNEW that all the taxes were paid, the house was sold, the creditors were satisfied...so I'd say it took a year, all told to completely "honor" the will. 90% was done within 6 months. My parents had trusts, as did my FIL, I don't know about my MIL, but I know she finally made a trust or will, as she didn't realize that NOT having one would be a huge pain for her family. Really, if you have prepared all the documents, I don't see that you ever have to deal with the legal system--UNLESS the estate is worth more than a certain amount and that would vary from state to state. In Utah, it must be over $500,000--since that's about what dad's total estate came to. As far as "tasteful inquiry"--well, you're the best judge of that! What are the family dynamics? Do you stand to inherit? You don't stand over the grave and discuss this. Hubby had a meeting with his brother and sister while his brother was in town for the funeral. They were all in agreement on everything, so it went smoothly. If you're not the POA, or executor, keep your mouth shut and wait for somebody who has the "power" to let you know. Offer help to do whatever you can to help--but don't look like you're expecting a handout. I agree with Jo Ann, the executor "executes" the will and it will be as he/she feels is in accordance with the deceased. (You can put ANYTHING you want in your will--it does not mean it will just magically happen....the executor has a lot of say and luckily things go smoothly.)
I've wondered about this as well. We also had to wait for probate because of the lack of guidance regarding trusts. An elder care attorney or social services should be able to answer or point you in the right direction.
Esjoholm, Because of your family's history with fraud about a year ago with your Sil, checking in with the executor now would be a good idea. Except that instead of asking if the will left something for you, approach the subject carefully with the family member saying, something like: "Want to confirm with you that you have the executor role; that my guardianship role is over, and if you need any information I will be glad to help." "After that fiasco with Sil, they may try something, having a fraudulent will or something"
You can do this at anytime. Then ask if there will be a reading of the will, etc.
Do you know if the will has to be probated in the county where she lived? That would leave the responsible executor very far away, perhaps needing help to file documents, or seeing the attorney in your state. I am just guessing here, but have heard some executors don't understand it is their duty now.
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
The executor is responsible for tracking down the beneficiaries of a will; so in due course your cousin should get round to notifying you of any legacy due to you.
With my cynical hat on, I would sigh that the correct procedure is to swallow your own tongue with frustration while the executor dillies about doing heaven only knows what for the Rest of Time, apparently unaware that the courtesy of a little information might be appreciated by all concerned.
But doffing that hat: if you're in social contact with your cousin anyway, there's no harm or bad manners in asking what the form is. And if the estate is sizeable or complex or involved, there is a fair bit of work to be done - so you might pat him or her on the head for that, too.
My parents had trusts, as did my FIL, I don't know about my MIL, but I know she finally made a trust or will, as she didn't realize that NOT having one would be a huge pain for her family. Really, if you have prepared all the documents, I don't see that you ever have to deal with the legal system--UNLESS the estate is worth more than a certain amount and that would vary from state to state. In Utah, it must be over $500,000--since that's about what dad's total estate came to.
As far as "tasteful inquiry"--well, you're the best judge of that! What are the family dynamics? Do you stand to inherit? You don't stand over the grave and discuss this. Hubby had a meeting with his brother and sister while his brother was in town for the funeral. They were all in agreement on everything, so it went smoothly. If you're not the POA, or executor, keep your mouth shut and wait for somebody who has the "power" to let you know. Offer help to do whatever you can to help--but don't look like you're expecting a handout. I agree with Jo Ann, the executor "executes" the will and it will be as he/she feels is in accordance with the deceased. (You can put ANYTHING you want in your will--it does not mean it will just magically happen....the executor has a lot of say and luckily things go smoothly.)
Because of your family's history with fraud about a year ago with your Sil, checking in with the executor now would be a good idea. Except that instead of asking if the will left something for you, approach the subject carefully with the family member saying, something like: "Want to confirm with you that you have the executor role; that my guardianship role is over, and if you need any information I will be glad to help." "After that fiasco with Sil, they may try something, having a fraudulent will or something"
You can do this at anytime. Then ask if there will be a reading of the will, etc.
Do you know if the will has to be probated in the county where she lived?
That would leave the responsible executor very far away, perhaps needing help to file documents, or seeing the attorney in your state.
I am just guessing here, but have heard some executors don't understand it is their duty now.
Sorry for your recent loss Esjoholm.
See All Answers