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You all have to read her profile amd other responses. The mother re-mortgaged her house for 100k and gave the money to her son. He now whats her to do a reversed mortgage. Won't happen because the house has no equity because of the re-mortgaging. This is all son's fault.
If she freely gave the $100 thousand to your brother, he had to know she now doesnt have the funds for care. I would pack her and her belongings up and she would be living with her son! So not fair to you to put up with this crap. Stand up for yourself. Mom and brother need to figure this out since theyre the ones who made this mess!!
Your brother has violated the law, he benefited personally by using his POA to get mom this loan.
I would contact the local authorities and file a complaint against him, that is how your mom will get the care she requires.
You know about all of this, so you are now responsible for doing the right thing. Protecting your mom against your predatory brother and if he goes to jail, oh well, who essentially risks their 90 year old mom's house to get money for themselves?
It may be helpless, but do you think brother would attend a meeting with you with a social worker or eldercare attorney that would explain the problems mom will be facing because of gift. Some people are uneducated and think if no taxable income, no Medicaid problem.
Unfortunately you are going to have to play hardball. No taking your mom into your house (unless you want to) and no contributing $$. She will have to be made a ward of state as that 100K is going to disqualify her for years. Good luck.
For a nursing home she would be disqualified for the number of months until the 100k is paid another way, by cash, by someone else. In my area a nursing home starts at about 10k a month. So in ten months at that rate the 100k penalty would be done.
Ashley I think you are going to need to make Mom a ward of the state if she needs Nursing Home care . That may mean calling APS and let them take guardianship if Mom is in really bad shape. You may need to do this because you are not going to be able to place Mom in a NH on your own without money or Medicaid. Let APS take over. (You don't have to be caregivers yourself if you are not physically or mentally able to as I've seen others state, APS will find a safe environment, but you won't have a say in the matter and possibly your brother will be investigated for financial abuse, but Mom will be taken care of)
How did this happen? You worked in social services and did not report it? Call social services and the area agency on aging for advice and help. An elder law attorney would be a good idea as well.
Until that gift of $100k is more than 5 years in the past, she will not qualify for Medicaid.
sit down with this son and explain what he has done to her....now she must live with him and he must take care of her until at least that 5 year look back has passed.
How does your brother think your mother will pay for a NH if there is no money and she can't qualify for Medicaid?
You're already the one who's taking care of your mother. The expectation will be that you continue to do so (and do even more) as she deteriorates. Does she need that much help that she needs a nursing home?
Sad to say, but plan for you and your wife to be the ones to be your mother's caregivers (possibly progressing to fulltime), UNLESS you decide now what's going to happen to prevent that. Everyone will expect it of you (your mother, your brother).
It looks like most of the question ended up in the profile. It is hard to follow but here are some highlights:
They're in Connecticut.
Both sons have general poa severally or jointly poa state or not both
my brother asked my mom to take a equity mortgae out 2017 said he need money to pay his mort and got 100, thousand dollars a year after dad died now she has no equity left in her house and now wants her to reverse mort so he dont have to pay bal 68, thousand back to her i think hes going to use his poa to do this mom sais no he wants mom in nursing home mom wants to stay in her home i always protected her i need help she stays home but no equity in home cause of him and can't qualify for Medicaid.
You gotta condense all these questions down. Give more details in your posts. Use punctuation. I'm really having a hard time understanding what you are asking. Do you mean poa as in power of attorney, and make a typo? Or the abbreviation pos? Those are two very different things.
Your mom wants to live in her home but who is going to be her 24/7 caregiver? You can contact your local area's Council on Aging for resources, and then the county your mom lives in for an in-home assessment for services, but I don't believe the county will pay for everything for in-home care. Medicaid doesn't happen "asap", you need to fill out the form (which can be downloaded at the Dept of Health and Human Services website for her county. There will be a "lookback" period so if there was any use of her money in ways that the county doesn't like, she may not qualify, may be penalized and may be delayed in qualifying. The lookback period can be from 2.5 to 5 yrs depending on her state of residence. The approval process takes a minimum of 3 months. Whoever is her financial PoA will need to help her apply. FYI she probably doesn't want to go into a NH because she maybe has heard or seen bad ones in the past. Now there are many new and fine facilities. Good luck!
Ashley, You have asked several questions regarding assistance for your Mom. Check with your Area Agency on Aging to find out what assistance is available. They will do an assessment for what she might need. Contact your county Medicaid office with assistance for Medicaid. Resources for walk-in bath tubs is not readily available and Medicaid does not cover equipment that requires home modification for installation. That would be the home owners responsibility. Long term care covered by Medicaid might be the best solution for your mom.
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
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APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
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If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
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This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
Your brother has violated the law, he benefited personally by using his POA to get mom this loan.
I would contact the local authorities and file a complaint against him, that is how your mom will get the care she requires.
You know about all of this, so you are now responsible for doing the right thing. Protecting your mom against your predatory brother and if he goes to jail, oh well, who essentially risks their 90 year old mom's house to get money for themselves?
You only need to post a question once.
And pack mom off to his house.
sit down with this son and explain what he has done to her....now she must live with him and he must take care of her until at least that 5 year look back has passed.
You're already the one who's taking care of your mother. The expectation will be that you continue to do so (and do even more) as she deteriorates. Does she need that much help that she needs a nursing home?
Sad to say, but plan for you and your wife to be the ones to be your mother's caregivers (possibly progressing to fulltime), UNLESS you decide now what's going to happen to prevent that. Everyone will expect it of you (your mother, your brother).
They're in Connecticut.
Both sons have general poa severally or jointly poa state or not both
my brother asked my mom to take a equity mortgae out 2017 said he need money to pay his mort and got 100, thousand dollars a year after dad died now she has no equity left in her house and now wants her to reverse mort so he dont have to pay bal 68, thousand back to her i think hes going to use his poa to do this mom sais no he wants mom in nursing home mom wants to stay in her home i always protected her i need help she stays home but no equity in home cause of him and can't qualify for Medicaid.
mom's 92