Unable to do basic care such as use the bathroom, bath himself put clothes on properly and sometimes do not know who I am. He insist he lives somewhere else and constantly leaves our home and gets lost. I am disabled myself and use a walker and cannot keep him from leaving the home. I am afraid that he will get hit by a car or someone will harm him, My problem is that all facilities charge form $5K to 7K each month and his income is not enough to cover, but he has too much income to qualify for government assistance. what can I do
I know that Secure Memory Care, which in NC is still considered assisted living, and help is available through a program called Special Assistance. Have you actually applied for that?
Due to the increased costs of Secure Memory Care, the income requirements may be different than regular cases. I read something about that. I would CONFIRM in writing from a caseworker with the Dept of Social Services. There has to be a way to protect him. I would insist on a complete evaluation to find him placement. I would treat it as an emergency and stress that to social services.
Perhaps others here who know more about getting financial help will also chime in here.
I might suggest alarms that would alert you to his leaving the house, but if you are disabled, then you may not be able supervise him.
Here's a link you might check out, but I wouldn't let the numbers on it discourage you. I would insist that they consider his case and find you resources. I wish you the best.
https://ncdhhs.s3.amazonaws.com/s3fs-public/documents/files/SA_SCU_ProgramBrochure.pdf
I'm addressing only the wandering issue. Some companies offer devices that purport to address wander management, but I would contact your local PD or fire department and ask if they have any suggestions for wander management monitoring.
I don't think any devices are like the electronic bracelets that parolees may have to wear, but the police would likely be able to give you some suggestions.
Again, I don't know much about spend down so I'm not sure if this suggestion is doable but I thought I'd toss it out there. You also have to look out for your future and not spend down too much so that you don't have anything if/when your husband goes into a nursing home.
I'm sorry you're going through this. It must be very stressful for you.
I do know that in NC the state actually provides payments to the facility for those who are deemed to need assisted living, especially those with dementia who can't stay safe. The social worker should be able to explain all of that and place him someplace safe immediately. I hope it works out.