He was in a nursing home and decided to come back and live with me. He is very ill and is now jaundice and keeps refusing to go to the hospital. He keeps saying tomorrow but tomorrow never comes. His family are now threatening me and saying that if anything happens to him they are holding me responsible. They even had the police come to our home last night. Can they force him to go to the ER? The police said that they can not make him go. I do not want anymore confrontation with his family since we do not get along and I argue with him about going to the hospital but it does not help. He just gets angry at me. Almost a year ago he was on the liver transplant list but because his MELD score was too low he is not considered a recipient and he does not want to go through the transplant. He only went through the motions to shut his family up. What are his rights and what are mine? I do not think I can be held for any responsibility for what he will or will not do. Please I am at my wits end and can not take all of this stress any longer. When he was hospitalized last year his sister had him sign over power of attorney when he was under the influence of ativan which is a controlled narcotic. He did not even know or remember that he signed anything and I am afraid she is going to interfere with his wishes again.
have you told his family to come get him? Have you asked him to leave your home? No the police cannot force him to receive medical care for his liver failure. No his family cannot force him to get medical treatment. Yes if he dies the family can have it investigated and you will be part of the investigation but unless you’ve actually done something wrong, nothing will happen. My late MIL’s boyfriend was investigated for murder after his first wife died, she stopped taking her meds and refused treatment of colitis and died and her family felt he was responsible. I believe she was on hospice and after our experience with him while MIL was on hospice I can see why his wife’s family had him investigated. But back to your situation, unless he’s asking you to take him to the hospital and you’re refusing or your refusing to give him his medication, there’s nothing you can be held responsible for. You might want to call APS and ask them to assess the situation because it will get this situation officially documented.
This man is still drinking, as seriously ill as he is, and that is another matter that seems like it can create a problem for you. Did you buy him the booze, for example?
It just seems like it's more trouble than it's worth for you to be taking on SUCH a gigantic responsibility with this friend. You are risking YOUR health and well being because the stress alone can kill you! Why not have his family come get him and then you can arrange to visit him from time to time, or speak on the phone, at the very least?
It sounds like you've done enough already and will be treated as The Bad Guy by the family after this man winds up killing himself from drinking too much.
Wishing you all the best.