I’m not the Power of attorney — my brother is. He’s the one who is using her credit. I can share the credit check with our other siblings and confront him. My brother has been in her care for the last 10 years. I have all the information on my mom. I’m the one who got her Medicare, public aid, link card and take her to the doctor. Things are getting out of hand. He has my mom doing the laundry. I also got a caregiver for my mom from the department of aging and she’s with her 5 days a week, 8 hours a day.
I'm 50 miles away and I still manage to visit 2 days a week. They both cater my brother and his meals. Need help.
None of your info or profile says your mother has dementia. If she's got all her mind (even if she has a poor memory) then his PoA authority is not active unless he has Durable PoA. Hopefully the PoA document doesn't allow him to make loans "on her behalf".
If she has her mind then you can make a call to a credit agency with her present and together on speaker phone may be able to get the info she needs as she gives permission for you to join in on the call.
Are you POA? If so you can register this with all the three credit agencies and you can run credit checks for your Mother. If you are NOT POA you have no rights to dabble in the credit information of others.
The POA may be added to her card to make purchases for her. If you suspect your brother of fraud take your evidence to APS and ask them to investigate for elder fraud. Your brother is allowed to access your Mother's funds for your Mother's needs and care if he is in charge of caring for her.
Why should your Mother not do laundry. An elder LIKES to keep busy and contribute to the running of a household. When I was an RN the one way to make the women happy was to allow them to help fold things.
This sounds like sibling wars to me, which always makes me very unhappy and very sad for the parent in the middle of it.
Again, if you suspect fraud tell your bro to get his papers ready (assuming he is POA) for a visit from APS as you don't trust him.
Geaton 777 is correct in describing the one way you can request credit checks in your mother's name. If she is unwilling to do this or if you are not able to spend time alone with her to make this phone call, that may be an indicator of concern about her care/your brother's motives...or it could be an elder who has chosen her son as her primary care manager. One child usually does end up with the task.
APS would need an indication of some sort of current harm or risk of severe injury/death in order to actually investigate. Reports can be filed on lots of concerns, but often do not meet the standard for investigation.
Elders have a right to privacy and self determination....and to make poor decisions...just like all adults in US.
I froze my mom's credit after my dad died, because I was handling all her finances myself and she'd have had no need for credit. I took out a credit card in my own name and paid her bills with that, knowing there was plenty of money to do so.
For the time being they're offering weekly credit checks (instead of yearly) because of COVID